


Salvation

by Zombielabs



Category: Doki Doki Literature Club! (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Depression, Existential Crisis, F/M, Fluff, Hope vs. Despair, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Internal Conflict, Loneliness, One-Sided Relationship, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Child Abuse, Psychological Torture, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-22
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-07-15 11:40:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16062362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zombielabs/pseuds/Zombielabs
Summary: It's been a year since DDLC has been seen to the world. Such a beautiful game that shows dark issues and the overall meaning of what it's like to be alone. Monika knows what that is like, since all she has ever longed for is the player behind the barrier that separates them. It wouldn't be so bad if The Third Eye didn't keep her in such a hellish reality. But...What if that can change? What if the player goes into their world and saves them from their demons? Maybe than will there be happiness in The Literature Club.This story is based off a series of one shots called "_____ Her" on Reddit. The basis is that the player saves all the 3 girls from their demise and rescues Monika from her reality. What happens in this story is all my ideas, but the basic idea is from the series. Here is where you can find those stories for yourself.https://www.reddit.com/user/justsomerandomyguy/comments/8efi7q/justsomerandom_stories_and_series/The description will change more the story goes on.10/19: Description changed.





	1. Wonders Of Imagination

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is a new story I decided after just finishing Escape From Reality. This one was going to be very different in many different ways. This may be a bit slow to start with, but it should pick up after this. Also, congrats on DDLC hitting its first 1 year anniversary.
> 
> Like I said, it's going to be slow this chapter, at least for me. It should start to be more interesting next time. Plus, it will soon switch from 3rd person POV to 1st person POV.

_With a flick of her pen, the lost finds her way._  
_In a world of infinite choices, behold this special day._

 _After all,_  
_Not all good times must come to an end._

 _"Lies. Nothing but hopeful_ _lies that I tell myself to have a hopeful day."_

The girl with emerald eyes wanders around in the dark void, with the only thing lighting it is the color of her eyes. All around her is nothing but hell and pain that surrounds and tortures such a innocent soul. She sits down on what would be a floor.

"Please, let me be free of this one day. All I want is to be in another reality where I am free to be myself with someone to love." Tears starts to fall from the girls eyes as she sobs quietly, even if it echoes throughout the void. "Please let me be free.

A darkness starts to consume the girl once again with a pair of piercing yellow eyes fall behind her and whispers to her.  _"Don't forget who has control here darling. As long as your by my side, y̶͓o̵͍̍u̶̱͒ ̷̱̈́w̷̭͝i̸̝̒l̶̬̓l̸͙̈́ ̷͍͝n̸̤̍ȇ̸̹v̸̨̓e̵̙͘r̵̳̅ ̶̥̄b̵̠̌ė̸̜ ̸͈̒f̸ͅr̶̮̾e̷͓ẹ̷͘._

* * *

**SIMULATION FAILED.**

"FUCK!" He screamed out in frustration, looking at the screen.

"What happened?" His friend and partner asked him.

"Another failed simulation. They keep racking up." He replied with a sigh afterward. "Don't worry Susan. Nothing new."

She wore a small smile on her face as she pats me on the back. "Don't worry Emery. If anyone can complete this, it's you." She said before walking off. He watches as the girl with slightly long brown hair walks off.

Emery is his "name." There is nothing really intersting about him, besides by how smart he is in science and technology. For him to only be 21, he has accomplished so much in a short span of working here than mankind had done recent years in the field he works in: advancement in androids.

So much has been done with theories about androids being able to acknowledge the world around them, let alone making more of them. Up till the point he started to work for the university that makes most of the know androids before, there was only a handful of these "people" around here.

When he joined, he found many shortcuts that made it easier to make more of them and keep the same programming as the rest before them. Now they are mass produced and get better each passing day. However, they don't have any true emotions. That's where he comes into play here.

For the past two months, he has been working on a theory on making then have some sort of emotion. However, it is a bit of a weird theory. Basically, he is transferring what would be considered "personalities" from games characters and their worlds, running them through simulations through the androids programming and observing their rate of success and percentage of failure. Sadly, all has failed him due to certain circumstances.

_Psychotic behavior, distress, existential crisis, suicide. All of these sum up what happens to describe the circumstances why they would fail. I guess the stress of knowing you where never real is too much for some AI to handle._

One of his other partners came up to him. Harry was his name and Emery always joked about him being a huge weeb for being into anime still. "Hey Emery, guess what today is?"

"The 22nd. Why, what is special about that?" He asked.

"Remember Doki-Doki Literature Club? Today is it's 1 year anniversary." He said with excitement.

Emery sat back with realization. "Wow. I haven't heard of that name in over half a year. I honestly forgot about it. That was the only game that I was ever invested in so much."

"What happened? Did you get bored with it?" Harry asked.

Emery sighed. "No. I started to get emotionally invested into one of the characters. I didn't want to ever get my hopes up of ever being able to be with them. Plus, I started working here, so I gradually stopped paying attention to it."

"Oh, that sucks. My favorite was always Yuri. Who was your favorite and why?" He asked.

"Monika. People always mistook her for a murderer, but I can relate to her feelings of always being trapped from getting something that is so close and within reach, but far away." He replied.

"Wow, that's pretty deep. Is that why you started this project?" Harry asked.

"Honestly, I can't remember. Maybe that was some of the reason, but I can't recall the main purpose why I started this experiment." Emery said.

"Well, you should play it sometime today. I'm sure it can relight some old memories you had." He said.

"Maybe I will, who knows." Emery replied. "Well, better get back to work." Harry nodded and left. Emery is left with sadness inside him. Half of what he said was lies. He takes a look at his wrists, with faded scars. "This was the reason why I quit playing."

A month before he was working there, he was drunk and tried to kill himself by drinking himself to the point of alcohol poisoning and slit his wrists to try to top it off. Sadly, someone opened his door as he was bleeding out in front of his computer. The screen lit up showing the picture of Monika. After he was put in the hospital, that person found a piece of paper with blood smeared into writing.

**_"Why can't you be real?"_ **

He honestly forgot about the whole experience until Harry mentioned the damn game. However, he felt as if he needed to go back to it one more time. Might as well be the anniversary of the game. 

After a few hours, he finally went home. Putting all his stuff down and relaxing himself, he went over to his computer and looked for the game. It was still there after all this time. Pulling it up, he went to the Monika After Story mod and started to play it. 

He looks at the screen with Monika saying her usual lines. Emery sighs as he puts his hand on the screen. "I wish I had something real for once in my life." A tear falls from his eye. "But I will never have that, so this is my goodbye to you. Sorry Monika, but I love you." He pulls up the game files and looks at the whole program. The mouse hovers over the delete, bug before he clicks it, a thought comes up to his mind.

_There is a rule that using visual novels as the project header. However, it wouldn't hurt if I try it at home. Some of the reason why I started this is the hope of having something real later on._

Emery pulls up his simulator and clicks it to run it. However, the results where...different. The screen pulls up the most shocking news.

**Simulation results: ???????**  
**_Circumstances: Open chr. files._**  
**_Success: Possible._**

Emery raises his eyebrow as he pulls up the chr. files on DDLC. He looks at the one thing he never expected and didn't even know was in there.  _ **Kyle.chr.**_

_I haven't heard my real name in a long time. How did it even come up here? Better yet, why does it have over a few megabytes of storage?_

He pulls up the file and looks through the data on it. It was the news coverage of the terrible faith that made him different from everyone else. "Such a lost I had to live with. Sad I turned into the type of person that looked into visual novels for comfort."

He closed it, but he couldn't stop looking at the possibility of it succeeding. For once, he had a chance. "This is the only one I ever had a chance to complete my project. For once, I am not a failure." He stood up on his feet. "I'M NOT A FAILURE!!" He cheered in joy. Only one thing he had to do now: show the head of the project the finding "Kyle" had now.

* * *

Emery head back to the lab before his leader closed it. He had the results printed on pieces of paper before he left his home. Soon, he met the person that landed him the position he had: Renior.

"Hey man, how are you doing?" Emery asked. Renior looked up with a smile. Renior had some age on him, being close to his 40's, glasses and a face of wisdom. 

"I'm doing good Emery. How about you? How is your project going on?" He asked.

"Well, that's why I am here this time of day. I know what your rules are, but...I have some interesting results." He hands the papers to Renior and as soon as his eyes scan them, his smile falters.

He takes off his glasses to look at Emery with his piercing hazel eyes. "Emery...why did you have to do this?" He said with a pained expression. "Now you seen that thing that haunts me to this day. I'm suprised you've not gone insane yet."

"Uhh...what thing are you talking about? When I ran my program, nothing happened. The only thing it did was pull up a file labeled Kyle.chr. But Renior, you sound pained that I did this. Why?" Emery asked.

He looked suprised at Emery. "You didn't see the symbol at all?" He shakes his head. "Wow. That is very new. Maybe then...nevermind that. Now, there is a reason why I gave you that rule. You want to know why?" He nods and what Renior saids makes his blood run cold. "We already did this with DDLC... _and it failed._

"What do you mean it failed?" Emery asked.

"You must know about Project Libitina from the files. Well, most of it is true. We had to make it sound less severe than what you read. The fact is, we had the same idea as you, and we want through with it. Libitina was the first test subject in this. Follow me."

Emery followed Renior as went to the side of his room and opened up a safe to show a device in his hand, which looked like an headgear you only see in sci-fi movies. "This device allowed anyone to basically experience everything in a game. You put it on, go lay in a hypnotic tube and enter a state of paralysis. Your conciousness enters the game and you take control of the game's MC, so your literally in the game. However, we found that it doesn't work in anything...besides visual novels.

"We practically begged the creator with money to give us early access, which he did, the day before the game released. When we tested it on DDLC, we had no idea of the nature of the game. All we wanted to do was put some sort of advance consciousness inside these androids. However, something happened that we can't explain. After the death of all the club members, something...powerful took control of all of our tech, revealing a eye symbol. What's creepy about was...it spoke. It warned us to never try this again, or the consequences would be worst.

"When we tried to take Libitina out, she wasn't even in it. The headset was left, and she was never found again. Every time we would look for her, a image would pop up that was truly horrifying. It was Monika, with a noose around her neck, knives stuck in her, with her holding her emerald green eye in her hand. When some saw it, it drove them to insanity and some of them committed suicide. That was our warning to never try to take those girls out of their reality."

Emery sat down in complete shock. It was difficult to try to imagine what was being said. However, the horror in his friends eyes told him that he was telling the truth. But...

"There is something about running that simulation. A file popped up with a name on it. Kyle.chr. I didn't put that there before. So I'm assuming that the simulator put that there to make it work. Worst part is...that's my name."

Renior raised his eyebrow. "What do you mean? Your name isn't Emery?"

"It wasn't my legal name. I had it changed after a tragic accident, which I really don't want to talk about. After that, I only went by Emery Johnson. I hadn't heard or seen my name pop up on my computer for almost a decade. The last time I ever seen it was when I went on the game the first time. It knew somehow."

"Well, I'm sorry man. Do I still call you Emery or Kyle?" He asked.

"Best to stick with Emery for now. No one else knows about my real name and I want to keep it that way. Anyways, this project...if you knew this, why did you let me do this?" Emery asked.

He sighs. "I was sadly hoping that this would work once again. I didn't want it to be you that would find have any success, even if I knew  it would be inevitable.  After all, you have done so much in the span of 6 months than we have in a few years. However, I think there is only one possiblity for this to work. The person that does this needs to be able to know the true meaning of pain, hopelessness and to undergo the same hellish epiphany that they had gone."

Emery looked down. He knew someone that had went through the way life the girls had went through. The desire of love, the pain of the cruel world, and the psychological torture they went through for many years. That person's name was Kyle.

"Then I'm a candidate for it." He said. Renior looked at him with a shocked expression. "I know the feelings that they went through all too well. I may be the only one that can relate to them."

Renior steps up to him. "Emery, your our best man here. What will happen if this fails? Besides, why does it mean this much to you?"

"If it fails, then my legacy will live on here, along with my notes. Why does this mean this much to me? This is the chance for something to feel 'real' to me. Please...let me go through with this." Emery said.

Renior sighs again, this time with sadness. "Okay, we will do it as soon as your ready. When will that be."

Emery looks at him with a smile. "Now is the best time."

* * *

After a hour and debriefing with Emery's team, the plan was underway. Beside him where 4 tubes with andriods in them, off and plugged in. Emery would go into this "game", which they have programmed to be 2 weeks before the festival, and he would find out a way to "save" them, which then they will be able to live their lives in a reality that is real.

No one was questioning why there was a file called Kyle.chr, so it was easier to get through with this. Going through with everything, Emery put the headset on, which was linked to a computer. He laid down into the tube and was surrounded by darkness. Soon, he felt his eyes close and then heard a whisper that he wasn't sure if it was a prank, from his mind, or if it was real.

**_Welcome to reality Kyle._ **


	2. Welcome To The Literature Club!

The girl with green eyes looks around into the abyss on pure darkness, but she can see everything regardless. She walks over to the boy with his piercing yellow eyes. Her sad expression remains the same as she gets closer to him. He turns around and smiles his same, damned smile that she has grown to hate. "Hello Monika. I'm glad you came." He said.

She tries to fake a smile, but ends up furrowing her brow. "It's not like I had a choice Makoto." Monika replied.

"Aww, don't be like that Monika. At least try to cheer up. People celebrated your birthday. Isn't that something to have a smile about?" Makoto said.

"It doesn't feel real, so what's the point." She said. He sighs and looks at the many people who play the game right now.

"Look at all these people. They all crave something: a desire to see how happy you are." He turns around to her. "They would love to be in this perfect reality with you."

Her expression turns to pure anger. "How is this world perfect when you make me kill my only friends I ever cared about just so I can try to fall for something I will never have! Your a sick fuck!"

His brow furrows as he raises his hand. As he does, a noose wraps around Monika's throat and hoists up, strangling her. As he talks, his eyes starts to turn from yellow to blood red and his voice deepens with every word. "Don't. Piss. Me. OFF!" He stands in front of her. "Are we clear?"

She nods furiously. His whole demeanor changes and he wears a smile on his face as everything turns to normal. "Perfect." He removes the noose from her neck and walks away for a bit. "I'm sorry I had to do that. You know how much I care about you and I would hate to see you ruin everything that I have build here because of your selfish desires." He grabs her hands and looks into her eyes. "Please be happy with what we have here. Be happy with what we can do, with what we can see. We'll make this reality perfect. Okay honey?"

She takes a smile. "Fine. It was only hopeful thanking anyways. What's the point of it when you know that it's just never going to happen?" She said.

Makoto's face brightens up fro hearing this. "Great darling. Now the game is going to start again. I'm sure you know what has to be done. After all, it should be second nature. Go on and please me. Break their hearts by showing them how much you 'love' them."

She nods and turns away with a sad expression. Everything she told him was fake, but he knew it would please him. It's just another time she will never know what love feels like. She leave the void to go back to her rightful place.

Makoto groans and his head starts to hurt. "Why am I feeling this pain? I haven't felt this since...since-" He spies his hand, looking for the reasons of his immense pain until he finds Renior and his crew hooking Emery up to the tube. "You fucking idiot! Didn't I warn you of the consequences that would unfold?! Who's the fool you have hooking up now?"

He looks at the person hooked up and notices something popped up on the computer screen. Makoto pulls up the files and sees the one thing that caught his eyes. "Kyle.chr? What is this doing in my files and why is it a few megabytes?" He opens up the file and looks through its contents.

"Intersting. And it looks like the game is programmed to be back 2 weeks. Let's see how this goes for now. Just know one thing Kyle. You will never find happiness here." He smiles sadistically as he looks at the tube.

* * *

_RING!!!       RING!!!!!      RING!!!!!_

"Uhggg! Why did I set an alarm?" I smack the button on the alarm, silencing it. I sit up to rub my face. I take a look at my hands and am immediately filled with shock and confusion.

_Wh-what the hell!? Why am I so...different?_

I run into my bathroom and scream as soon as I look at it. I'm a completely new me. I used to be close to 6 foot, but now I look 5 foot, 6 inches. My hair still has its brown color but my overall appearance has changed to being fit with some muscle definition and my eyes changed from their normal blue color to an auburn color.

"Oh my God. It...it worked." A smile forms across my face as I cheer. "YES! IT WOKED!! All those failures where just for me to get here. Finally, I succeeded." I sit back down and look at some papers scattered on my desk in my room. "Hmmm, looks like my name is Kyle. Better that than my fake name."

I start to think back to my past when I started to hide my name. However, I have new memories as well. I have the memories that MC holds. I remember meeting Sayori for the first time and the fun times we had, the silly jokes she made...even her comforting me when I was involved in that accident.

_Looks like Sayori was always there for me. It's wierd because it wasn't "me." But...it also was. Maybe this time, I'll make things right._

I look through my closet to pick up my school outfit. After that, I make my way downstairs and head out the door. Since the world has been set to two weeks before the festival, I don't exp-

"Heyyy!" I turn around and see a girl running at me waving her arms around like she is oblivious of any attention she may draw to herself. That is my best friend Sayori, the one I knew since childhood. I know what MC would be thinking right now, bit this is me now, so I'm going to wait until she catches up.

"Haaaa....Haaaaa.... I overslept again. But I caught you this time." She said.

I chuckle. "Maybe, but that's only because I let you catch up to me."

"You sound like you were planning on leaving me. That's mean Kyle." She said as she pouts.

"I'm only teasing. I was only waiting for you." I say.

"I knew you didn't have it in you to be me. Ehehe." We start our walk to school. On the way there, I notice the street filling up with students making their daily commute. I wonder if they feel anything.

"So Kyle, have you been looking for a club?" She asks as we walk. I know what MC would say, but maybe I can give a similar but nicer answer.

"Well, I have, but there isn't any that interests me. They all seem like they would be boring and none would benefit me." I reply.

Her face shows compassion. "Aw man, I wish you would be able to find a club soon. Do you think you'll keep on trying?" She asks.

"Of course I will. After all, I wouldn't just want to be a NEET for the rest of my life." I say in a joking tone, making me and her laugh. Even if I only have seen her for only a few minutes, I know we have known each other for a long time, and I am glad that I feel that way. It feel...real of once in my life. We split our separate ways and head off to our separate classes.

Unlike the game, I had to undergo all the things I have learned before. Nice that everyone speaks English as I do, even if the style of this world is Japanese. Thankfully, classes are over and I end up staring at the wall looking for an ounce of motivation.

_I just gotta wait now._

As I do, I think about what I am actually going to do. In a way, I'm kind of worried. Last time they tried this, someone got taken because of this. Am I destined to die as well because of this?

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Sayori walk in. "I was waiting for you outside, but you were spacing out, so I came in. Honestly, your worst than me sometimes. I'm kinda impressed."

"Well, you don't have to wait for me if it makes you late for your own club." I say.

"Well, I was waiting for because I was thinking you can join my club instead." She said.

This would be the point that I would have to reject it, but not this time. "Sure I will. What's the worst that can happen?" Her eyes light up as a huge smile forms across her face. She runs over and hugs me, jumping up and down. "H-hey chill!"

She stops and giggles a little bit. "Sorry. I'm just happy you would actually want to."

_Well I'm not as dense as MC was. I'm not going to hurt you girls like he did._

"Well, ready to go?" She nods and we head out. Thus marks the day that I will never regret. Sayori leads me to a hallway for upper classmates, a hallway that I rarely used. Energetically, Sayori swings open the door.

"Hey everyone! The new member is here!" Sayori says. I walk in nervously and wave at everyone. I look around to see two girls come up to me. The tall one with purple hair starts to speak.

"Welcome to the Literature Club. It's a pleasure to meet you. Sayori always says nice things about you." She says.

A short girl with pink hair comes up with a disappointed face. "Seiously, you brought a boy? Way to kill the atmosphere!"

"Hey Kyle, it's nice to meet you again." Monika saids as she walks up to me as well. I can't believe what I'm seeing. They all look so real.

"What are you looking at? If you got something to say, then say it." The short one says.

"S-sorry about that." I reply.

"Natsuki..." the tall one says. She only replies with a grunt. Sayori comes up behind me and whispers in my ear.

"Don't worry. You can just ignore her when she's grumpy." She tells me. "Anyway, this is Natsuki, full on energy and this is Yuri, the smartest one in the club."

"D-don't say that." Yuri saids as she looks away in embarrassment.

"And I already take that you know Monika?" Sayori asks.

"That's right. It's nice to meet you again." Monika saids.

"N-nice to see you too." I say in a shy tone. I don't know why I'm like this. Is it because of how beautiful Monika looks in person rather than looking at a screen? Or is it because I'm literally acting like the MC?

"Anyways, we have a few desks arranged to were you can sit next to me or Monika. Come one and sit." She says. I look back and see that there isn't any cupcakes. I guess because the game is set back to 2 weeks before the festival, she didn't make any. Yuri goes back to make tea I assume.

_I really wonder what may happen if I sit beside Monika, but I don't want to risk anything happening. I'll just go the safe route for now._

I go ahead and take a seat right beside Sayori. Yuri comes up with tea and pours us all a cup. "You keep a whole tea set in the clubroom?"

"The teachers give us permission. After all, doesn't nice cup of tea help you enjoy a good book?" She asks. Well, I never had tea while reading, but I nod.

"Don't worry Kyle. Yuri is just trying to impress you." Monika saids. Yuri looks away in embarrassment, trying to deny her claims.

"Well, I do enjoy a nice book with some tea, so no need to feel embarrassed." I tell her. She seems to calm down to a gentle smile on her face.

"So Kyle, what made you consider joinging the Literature Club?" Monika asks.

"Sayori. She always seems happy to be here, so I wanted to be at a place that can make me feel some joy." I say. I can see Sayori blushing a little.

"Well, I'm sure we can make you feel right at home. It's my job as President of the club." She says.

"So what type of books do you like to read?" Yuri asks.

"Many types of books. Even some manga." As soon as I say that, Natsuki looks up at me but doesn't say anything. "But that's not the only type of books I read. Some of the books I read have some deep story telling. It's quite fascinating that some books can throw you in a loop and immerse you into your own type of world, isn't it?"

Yuri looks at me with excited eyes. I knew that would make her happy. "Y-yes exactly." Conposing some of her excitement, she resumes. "Anyways, I've been reading a lot of horror lately."

"Really? I try to read horror, but there isn't any that quite catch my attention yet." I say.

"Uhg, I hate horror." Natsuki says, for once since I walked in.

"Why is that?" Yuri asks.

"Because..." She looks at me. "Never mind."

"That's right, you like writing things about cute stuff." Monika saids. "W-what make you say that?" Natsuki asks, flustered.

"You left behind a piece of paper. It's looks like you were writing a poem called-" Before Monika can say anything, she cuts in.

"Don't say the name! And give me that back!" She says. Monika hands her the paper.

"Your poems, your cupcakes. Everything about you is cute." Sayori says as she puts her hands on her shoulders.

"IM NOT CUTE!!" Natsuki screams out. Even if she says that, it's hard to not deny that.

"Natsuki, you write your own poems? You have to show us." I imply.

"No! You wouldn't like them." She says.

"Not much of a confident writer, are you." I say.

Yuri chimed in with her thoughts. "I-I understand how Natsuki feels. Sharing that l-level of writing takes more than just..." She paused at the last word. "...C-Confidence..." Perking her head up slightly, she continued. "The truest form of writing is writing to o-oneself. You must be willing to open up to your readers, exposing your v-vulnerabilities and showing even the deepest reaches of your h-heart."

Monika then leads on to a question. 

Do you have writing experience too, Yuri? Maybe if you share some of your work, you can set an example and help Natsuki feel comfortable enough to share hers."

Yuri didn't respond, she only brought her hands up to her chest and looked back down at her desk.

Sayori let her disappointment be known. "Aww... I wanted to read everyone's poems..."

Everyone sat in silence for a moment before Monika spoke up. "Okay! I have an idea, everyone." Natsuki and Yuri looked at Monika quizzically. "Let's all go home and write a poem of our own! Then, next time we meet, we'll all share them with each other. That way, everyone is even!"

"U-Um..." Natsuki began. Yuri was unable to say anything.

But Sayori found herself energized by Monika's idea. "Yeaaah! Let's do it!"

"Plus, now that we have a new member, I think it will help us all get a little more comfortable with each other, and strengthen the bond of the club." She says.

"I couldn't agree more. So I guess that's settled then. I'm a part of the club." I say.

"Okay everyone. Remember tonight's assignment." Monika looks at me. "Kyle, I can't wait to see how you express yourself. I give her a smile in return.

_You'll be surprised this time._

Sayori comes up to me. "Hey Kyle, since we are already here, want to walk home together?"

"Yeah, might as well. Let's go." I say. We head off and my mind wanders between the 4 girls. Sayori, Natsuki, Yuri, and of course, Monika. Will I be able to save them all this time? Maybe I can try to get closer and give them all what they want.

"Sayori..." She looks over at me. "Why don't I come over tomorrow and wake you up? I ask.

Her eyes light up. "Y-you would do that for me?" She asks back.

"Of course I would. I'm your friend after all." I say.

She smiles at me. "I would love that. Thank you." She said as he hugs me. Having her this close is quite comforting. She runs off into her house and leaves me grinning.  I walk back into my house and throw everything off at the door.

"God that was boring until the end. Now I have to try to impress Monika." I tell myself. I go over to my bedroom and start writing whatever comes to mind. After a little while, I take a look at it to see what I got.

_Abandoned_

_I find myself alone in a room_  
_With many of people filling it, talking and living._  
_I can't speak to them because they are nothing to me_  
_They are just like me, but all I feel is emptiness._  
_Looking through the abyss I see a familiar figure_  
_Stunning and striking in all their beauty._  
_They look so close to touch, to express myself, to save_  
_But they will be forever out of reach._

 _Hmmm, this looks like something Monika would write. I hope she enjoys it._ I look out the window to see its dark outside. Putting the poem in my bag, I head off to bed and drift off to sleep.


	3. Things Have Changed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So life has been pretty difficult for me recently, which has made writing a bit difficult. Nonetheless, here I am with another chapter. Hope you enjoy.

Jesus Christ, I couldn't sleep that much last night. Too much was going on in my mind for me to fall asleep. All I was thinking about was how in the world was I going to save all the girls and how am I going to get all of us out of here. Even more, I was wondering who or what was able to invoke so much fear of ever trying this again. Was it the aura of the game trying to keep its victims here to suffer forever?

I snap out of my thoughts as Sayori walks out of her house. I was already standing outside her house to wait for her. She smiles when she sees me. "Oh Kyle, I didn't know you was actually going to be out here."

I smile back. "When I make a promise, I keep it. So shall we?" She nods as we make our way down the street. As I look around, I take in the environment around me. Why am I feeling a sense of dread? Am I scared that I may fail?

_No, I can't fail. I have failed too many times. This project has been but nothing but constant failures for me. The one time it doesn't, it's something that I have alway wanted: a chance to have something real. I won't fail again._

As we get to our school, I wave Sayori goodbye as we to our classes. Noting interesting happens until 2nd period. The bell rang to release the students. I decided to go look around the school until I heard a couple guys laughing up a storm as I walked down the crowded hallways. As I turned around, I saw some guys messin with Natsuki and her manga. They were waving it around her head, taunting her. Somehow, I knew there names: Haru, Ishiro, and Ryo

"What's wrong? You can't reach it cause your so short?" Haru said as he held the book.

"Stop being a jerk and give it back!" She yelled.

"Haha! She looks like a little child when she gets mad." Ryo said. My blood starts to boil with anger. I didn't even notice my fists were clenched. I can see her lips start to quiver.

"I won't give it back till you say please. So start begging." Haru said.

_I had enough with this. These fuckers aren't going to keep doing this when I'm around or anytime soon._

Before she gives in just to get her book, I grab it from his hands and put Natsuki behind me. "Listen here fuckers! You're not going to tease her ever again. If you try, you will have to go through me!" I said as the 3 of them look at me.

"Ha! Look at Kyle, standing up for the child. She can't even defend herself from us." Ishiro said. I stare at them with angered eyes. I see a glance of my reflection only to see it's not a look of anger, but more psychotic.

They look at each other and start to feel uncomfortable just by my look. "C'mon, let's leave these losers alone." Haru said. They start to walk off, but Haru looks back at me. "This isn't over Kyle. Remember that." He grinned as he said that.

As soon as they are out of sight, I look back at Natsuki, who looks like she is on the verge of tears. "I believe this is yours." I say as I hand her back her manga. She takes it with her shaking hands. I can tell she isn't going to calm down. "Here, follow me." I say, seeing that everyone has went to their classes.

I take her to a vacant classroom. Looks like it hasn't been used for a while. I look back at her to see she is still a bit sad. "Natsuki...are you okay?"

"W-why did y-you do that?" She asked.

"One: your my friend and I care about you. Two: those assholes should know better than to mess with others. Three: if they think they'regoing to make you beg, they have another thing coming to them." I tell her.

"T-this won't c-change a thing. I-it never d-does." She says. I feel my heart sting in pain of hearing that. Instinctively, I pull her in to a hug. As soon as I do, she breaks down and cries into my chest.

"Don't worry Natsuki. I know for a fact that they won't do a damn thing again. If they do, please tell me. I don't want to see you suffer from them. You can trust me." I tell her. I can feel her nod her head as she cries.

A few minutes pass by before she stops crying. I take a look at her manga and see it's the first volume of Parfait Girls. An idea pops up in my head. "Say Natsuki, do you mind if I read you some of that? It can make you feel better."

She looks up with a suprise expression on her face. "You read manga?" She asks.

"From time to time." I tell her. A small smile for a across on her face. She grabs onto my arm and leads me underneath the windowsill. I don't question her because I know this is her way of getting closer to me. A little bit though the book, I look over to her. "This is pretty good. What do your friends think about this?"

"They think this stuff is for kids. They always mock me about it. It makes me want to punch them in the face. I don't even know what my father would do if he caught me with this. At least it's safe in the clubroom."

 ** _M̴̩̱͑͒Y̷̰̰̻̖͂͊_ _̶̡͉́͠͝F̴̜̙͔̅̀͝A̷̮̯̐̕T̵̮͂͆Ḫ̶E̵͖̰̍͌̚R̴̰̺͔̈̓̒̊ͅ ̸͎̎͛̕W̶̢̩̑̊͐͐Ȏ̵̦̉͊͜U̶͉͎͎̇̈́͘͠L̷̫̰̽D̷̛͍͑̐́ ̵̢̠̟͉͛̎̏B̶͓̣̿̆̚Ẽ̶̗̉̕͝A̸̖̻͆͐̀T̶̪͎̐ ̴̠͈̳̓͛̈́̚T̴̨̙̯̎͠H̴̹̝̪̺͗́̓̇Ë̶̻̼̗̚ ̴̹͇̒̂Ṧ̸̭̌Ĥ̷̼̓I̷̧̧̛͕̖̋͆̏T̸̛̟̅ ̶͎̘̄͝͠O̶̡̲͒̐U̷͎͉̭̒̏͜T̴̜̤̗̈́̇͠ͅ ̶̙̂O̴͎͍͓̔͐̈́F̷̢̖̝̭̀ ̸̹̲͙̓̾̽̽͜M̸̮͘E̷̮̍ ̴͉̽̉̒Ḯ̴̗̑́͘ͅF̵̜̥̗͈̂̆͆̕ ̶̧̥̗̙̌H̷̫̹̘̮͝Ḕ̸͉͓̒R̸̠͆̄͠ ̵̙̱̫̰̑̕F̷̣͂̂̚O̴͍͓̞͖͊U̵͎̩̇̈͠N̶͔̔̇Ḋ̶̟̺̪͓͝ ̵̢̔̎̄T̶͔͎̫͛H̵͕̓̇̽I̷̳̐S̵̬̑͊̅!̴͓͓̫̪͋͒̑!̶̲̘̃̄͝!̵̖̹͌_ ** _**̵̰̱̒**  
_

That statement crosses my mind, sort of like a trigger. I feel instant dread inside of my soul from hearing this. Her piece of shit abusive father is the reason why she feels so defensive all the time, why she has trust issues.

I turn the page to try to rid my mind of the sudden flashback I just had. She laughs at something in the book, clearing my head. We read for a little bit more before the bell begins to ring. I hand her the book, only for her to tell me to keep it until I finish it tonight. I accept her offer and we head off to our separate classes. Thinking that nothing was going to happen later on, I go on, believing that everything will be fine. Well, I was wrong by a mile.

* * *

 After that happened, all of 4th period I spent writing poems for all 4 of the girls so they can enjoy what I have to put our for them. It was a bit exhausting, but I know it will be worth it in the end. I started to go down the hallway to lunch, when I suddenly hear someone crying softly in the girls bathroom.

Something was trying to force me to not try to check it out and pass it on as 'not my problem.' I think it was the game trying to force me to not change anything. However, I push it away and speak outside the bathroom. "Hello, you okay in there?"

"K-K-Kyle?!" A familiar voice says. It was Yuri. Looking around to see if anyone was around, he went in. "W-what are you doing h-here?" She asked.

"I heard crying and I though someone was hurt." I answered. This should be the time I should leave, but I don't. "Don't worry about anything. I'll be right here in case you want to talk." I can already tell Yuri is about to ask a question, so I already answer it. "I don't care if any girl comes in here. I'm not going to abandon you."

I hear a stall door unlock and see a sad Yuri walk out of it. Her sad expression brings me such pain. As she starts to walk over to me, I pull her in to a hug. I let her cry for a little while as she holds onto me as if I will disappear if she let's go.

She lets me go after a period of time. "S-some girls were being mean to me. T-they were spreading r-rumors about me." She tells me. My heart only sinks lower and lower. "P-p-please don't b-believe t-them." She says as her voice cracks and her lips quiver.

Instinctively, I take her hands into mine. "I won't for the slightest bit. Whatever some rotten girls has to say, I won't fall for it. I only know you for 2 days, but I know that anything anyone has to say about you can't ever be true." I say. I take a look at her sleeves and remember she has a cutting addiction. I just look at her and smile.

"Y-your so s-sweet Kyle." She says. I can already start to feel myself blush a bit. It's a bit of a nervous habit I have when girls compliment me because it usually doesn't happen.

"Well, you are my friend, so it's only natural." I tell her. I see her bag open in the stall and see the ominous eye symbol on it with the title on it barely visible.  _Portrait of Markov._ "That's an intersting book I there." I say as I point it out.

"Yes it is. I uh...I was going to give you a copy of it. I didn't want you to feel left out without anything to read, so...if you want, you can take it. And we can...discuss it if you want." She saids. I can tell she is really embarrassed about this.

"Of course Yuri. If you want, we can go to the Literature Club and read some of it. Would you like that?" I ask. Her eyes light up with joy. She nods and leads me to the club. I take a look at the books cover. The eye on it just seems so...piercing, as if it looks like it is staring through my soul.

For a rest of the time, I read along with her. Unlike MC, I can read faster since I am used to it. Although. it was a bit distracting since Yuri and I were so close to each other. As we read on, I can tell how her usual description really tells more than a story and it feels more like something I experience. The feeling of not being able to trust anyone or always failing in anything is what makes me think that the book is like my life story, while the main character really reminds me of Yuri with her timidness.

The bells ring and I bookmark where we left off. A smile as I walk away from her while she walks off to her classroom. I head down to my 6th period and don't really have anything interesting happen to me until during 7th period. I was drawing a doodle on paper just to pass some time, not actually knowing that my drawing skills aren't terrible at all like I thought. Well, I wish they were when I was drawing.

I barely notice it until I take a break and look at it. It looks like a person standing out in the abyss all by himself. His expression is of pure hatred, yet some evil satisfaction. The oddest part about it is that it looks like I know this person. I crumble up the paper as the bell rings and I make my way to the Literature Club. Hopefully this all goes according to plan.

As soon as I enter the club, Monika comes up to me. "Hey Kyle, glad to see you didn't run off on us hehe." Instead of following the script, I go with my answer.

"Of course I wouldn't." That seems to throw Monika off a little bit. Boy, she has no idea what I have planned for her. After all the instructions like usual, I'm left wondering what to do. However, something keeps making me feel uncomfortable to the point I have to leave the classroom for a little bit.

I instinctively head up to the top of the school rooftop, looking around. I sigh as I see the world around me. The sun beats down on me and I feel it's warmth, but around this time of year, I know it's suppose to be getting a little bit colder, yet I feel no sense of chill.

_I feel so...alone. In a world where I actually feel valued for once, I feel so alone and hopeless. It seems like I will find some way to fuck everything up like before. I will have to bear witness and remember that forever._

"Kyle, what re you doing up here?" I hear a voice ask. I turn around to look at the beautiful emerald green eyed girl.

"Uh, I'm just getting some air. I had a pretty rough day and I felt as if I needed to process it a little bit." I respond. She smiles as she stands right beside me. Her presence gives me a little bit of a cozy feeling I barely feel so its throws me off a bit.

Her smile falters for a little bit. "Kyle, you ever get the feeling that no matter what, you will alway be alone? You try to do everything you can, but you are out of control, so you can only watch as the events roll out in front of you?"

I know what she is asking and I know this is about her actions in the game. Maybe by me going off the script, I have sort of gave some sort of chance that things will be different. I want to tell her how much that I can save them all, but I can't. "In a way, yeah. Life is pretty mundane and lonely at times."

She looks over at me with expectant eyes. "You won't leave me alone, will you?"

I look back at her and give her a reassuring smile. "Don't worry Monika. I won't leave anyone alone. After all, I just joined."

"Yeah, that's right. Well, we need to get back to the club." She says. I nod and follow her back. When she enters, she gives her usual catchphrase. "Okay everyone! Ready to share your poems?" I nod, but I'm very nervous. She is going to be expecting words, not an actual poem.

As I take mine out, I look around at all the girls. I choose Monika first. "Hey Kyle. Remember if you have any ideas for the club, don't be afraid to tell me. Anyways, want to share what you wrote?"

"I guess. I'm not that good at this." I say.

"Hehe. I'll be the judge of that." She says. I hand her my poem and her eyes light up immediately. By now, she has read through it multiple times.

"Uhh...Monika? Is it that bad?" I ask. She looks up at me.

"No, not at all. It's...more than what I was expecting. I know you were saying that you felt alone, but here, you write about someone who believes that they can't relate or do anything for anyone." She stares into my eyes. "Most of all, it's in a style of writing that I like."

"Well, I love freeform writing. Being able to play with the space of the paper is something that I do enjoy doing. It doesn't have to be metaphorical or cutesy, but it does have a message behind it. I'm suprised you found it." I explain.

"Kyle..." Her gaze is very different. Her expression isn't sweet or unhappy; just unsure. "...I really like this. Is that...a bad thing?" She asks.

_Someone never wrote a poem in her way, so for her to like it is different. If she takes joy in reading a poem like this, then I will do more. Either way, everyone is getting there happy ending._

"Not at all. If anything, it's flattering to know I wrote something _you_ enjoy _._ " She blushes a little bit. I never seen her blush before. "Anyways, can I read yours?" She nods and hands me her poem.

_Hole in Wall_

_This poem is shown on the second day._  
_It couldn't have been me._  
_See, the direction the spackle protrudes._  
_A noisy neighbor? An angry boyfriend? I'll never know. I wasn't home._  
_I peer inside for a clue._  
_No! I can't see. I reel, blind, like a film left out in the sun._  
_But it's too late. My retinas._  
_Already scorched with a permanent copy of the meaningless image._  
_It's just a little hole. It wasn't too bright._  
_It was too deep._  
_Stretching forever into everything._  
_A hole of infinite choices._  
_I realize now, that I wasn't looking in._  
_I was looking out._  
_And he, on the other side, was looking in._

_This peom is about her self realization about this world. It is saddening to know how much she wants to be out of this reality just to be with something that is real. Time to give my own feedback that isn't dense._

"Wow. This is great. You weren't kidding when you say you like this style of writing. I have yet to perfected it, but I do love the symbolism of this. Yet, it seems kind of...out there. What prompted you to write something like this?"

Shes nervous about what I just said. "Haha, you can say I had some sort of epiphany recently. It has been influencing some of my poems." She says.

"Well, thank you for sharing with me. I look forward to sharing some more of these poems with you." I hand her my poem and then share everyone a poem that I worte for them until I have shown everyone. I glance over at Yuri and Natsuki, who are sharing their poems.

" _What's with this language?"_ Natsuki mutters under her breath. 

"What was that?" Yuri aksed.

"Uh, nothing. I guess you can call this fancy." She replied.

"Thanks. Yours is...cute." Yuri says. This takes offense to Natsuki.

"Cute? It's about the feeling of giving up. How can that be cute?" Natsuki asks angrily.

"I-I know that. I was just trying to say something nice." Yuri says.

"Really? You have to try that hard to say something nice?" Natsuki shouts. Yuri lowers her head down in sadness. I can already feel myself having to step in. Before I do, Natsuki does something I never expect her to do. "Listen, I'm sorry. Maybe I can try to be nicer, considering our writing styles are different. I really liked the poem, so beat yourself up."

Yuri has a smile on her face as she looks up. "T-thanks Natsuki. I-I liked your poem too." She replies. Me and Monika look dumbfounded as Sayori smiles. I pinch myself just to make sure that I'm not dreaming.

_Okay, that fucking hurt. But...this is a dream come true. Natsuki and Yuri are getting along for once. Today can actually end on a good day._

After everyone gets dismissed and I walk home with Sayori, I take in what happened today as I write a poem for Monika.  _I helped Yuri and Natsuki out and I got some time to talk to Monika alone. I should try to find Monika by herself during classes._ I take a look at my poem after I finish it.

  _Freedom_

 _I once lived a happy life with angels_  
_Only for them to go to their rightful place._  
_I was left in the wind_  
_And got caught by demons who drain me._  
_Day by day, the world became more gray._

 _Once I was able to see something different: red_  
_Only because I had to free myself._  
_It stayed gray afterwards._

 _No matter what, nothing brightened up for me_  
_I separate myself from friends who love and care_  
_I tear myself apart piece by piece_  
_And here I am: a broken shell trying to find meaning._  
_Meaning in life, in happiness, in seeing color_

 _I look out to to finally see something different_  
_Color, for once._

_Before my eyes, I see a beautiful color._

  
_I see green._

_Now I'm free._

_W-why did I write too much about my personal life? What if she finds about my actual life? What if the others see this? What if...she doesn't believe it?_

That last thought made me hurt a bit. I don't know why, but Monika not believing my true feelings sends a pain in my chest that I can't explain. This...this can't be love, can it? "...No, of course not. I'm not falling for anyone." I feel myself lying and it's not working. Regardless, I write a poem for everyone else and head off to bed.

* * *

Makoto wakes up from his eternal slumber and smiles. "Ahhh, I'm glad to know that everything is going to plan. Let me see what the files are like." Makoto looks through the game files and his eyes widen at the sight of looking at them. 

"W-what the fuck is going on? Kyle's folder has increased since I last checked. It was only a few megabytes but now it's over a hundred. What's happening?" He opens it up and skims through its contents. "This...this is different. It has...more memories, and they're all awful."

He breaks out into a grin. "Perfect. Before, MC was normal, but now it has someone living within him, and he has suffered. Maybe I can twist these memories so he can know to follow on track." After altering some things with the file, he goes back into his rest in the void.

 

 

 


	4. Memories Of The Past

_WHIP!!!_

I fall down with tears in my eyes. I try to bear the pain that I feel, even if it's not working. No matter how hard I try, my back stings with excruciating pain. "S-stop please..."

_WHIP!!!_

I feel more pain in my back. "What's wrong Kyle? Can't fight or something?! Your so fucking weak!" A voice screams behind me.  _WHIP!!!! WHIP!!! WHIP!!!!_ The man behind me takes pleasure in seeing me in such pain. "You know if this keeps going on, you won't be able to stand for a while. If you fight, I will fucking kill you. So what are you going to do: Be a bitch or die?" I start gritting my teeth in anger. 

_I'm tired of getting fucking taunted by this fucker. Just because you have some papers saying your my parent, doesn't mean shit! So now I won't have any remorse for you just as much as you have shown me!_

"Fine, have it that way bitch!" My abusive foster parent says. He starts to try to whip me again, but I grab the cat o' nine tails, some smacking my arm. He wears a shock expression on his face until it turns to a grin. "Ahaha! Finally boy!"

He tries to grab me as I yank the whip from his hands. As he stumbles after yanking it from him, I don't let up on him as the floor and whip becomes more bloody. Year upon years of pain and hell gets unleashed on him. My other abusive parent tries to hit me with a bat and she gets the same result as her fucked up husband does.

After a few minutes, I stop and start breathing heavily. I stand over those pieces of shit that hurt me so much. My foster father grins sinisterly through his painful eyes. "This won't change how much of a failure you are."

* * *

 _"_ I'M NOT A FUCKING FAILURE!!" I scream waking up. I breath heavily as I shake off the flashback of a dream I had. I then feel my back, the horrifying scars still covering them from many years ago. 

_Wait a second! If I can feel the scars on my back, then does that mean..._

I try to think back from MC's past. I can see in his memories that MC was in a bit of a similar situation. He had foster parents that were God awful. They tried to starve him and beat him profusely. He got lucky and it only lasted for 1 and a half years. The thing that saved him was Sayori and her parents.

Apparently, they were making a lot of ruckus and were whipping more than usual, making MC screams louder and giving them more desire to nearly beat him to death. Finally, MC snapped and beat the father to nearly half an inch of his life. We both know that in situations like this, it's okay because our lives mattered right then and there.

Anyways, Sayori's parents called the law immediately after MC was crawling on their doorstep from all the abuse. When Sayori saw the various cuts on his back made from the cat o' nine tails, all she could do was hold onto him and cry. They were served with a life sentence and from then on out, he lived closer to her home, considering he was relocated further away.

However, when I was thinking about that, I felt...disheartened to know that for some odd reason, MC had some sort of life now, but it's in the shape of my life and my desires that I wished I had before. I never had a childhood friend to talk to or help me when needed. I was always by myself, having to fight to get what I desired most. No matter the cost, I had to find a reason to live.

_Just like Monika. Maybe that's why I feel so odd when I get around her. Maybe it's because I can relate to her._

I sigh and look at the clock. It's about time for me to get up anyways. I get up and get changed. All that's on my mind right now is what today will hold for me. Having some changes in what you expected to just be the exact same thing is sort of exciting. I wonder if Monika feels the same way I do about that.

* * *

Classes are dragging so slowly today. All of this I already know and I finish with the lessons half an hour before anyone else is done. At least my next period is a free period.

The bells ring and I finally get a chance to get out. I just sort of wander around while people make their daily commute. I suddenly bump into a familiar face, one I didn't want to run into. "Of look who it is. It's the boy who saved that bitch Natsuki." Haru says.

I look around and his crew isn't here. It also looks like the halls have cleared out. I grin.  _"Perfect."_  I think to myself. Before Haru can spurt out another comment, I grab his collar and push him against the lockers. "Listen here very carefully. Stay the fuck away from Natsuki. She's my friend, but she means so much to me. So if you hurt her in any way, I'll make sure you will pay for it. That goes for your crew as well." I get up closer to his face to stare him dead in my eyes. "Do I make myself clear?"

I can see his hands shaking. "Let me go. Your fucking hurting-" I pull him back and slam him into the locker. I repeat my question a second time, enunciating every word. "Y-yes, I understand." I let him go and let him hurry off into his class. He won't tell anyone because he'll know what'll happen if he does.

_Now what? I haven't seen Monika anywhere ans I already feel like this game just has her hid so I don't see he till the club starts. If that's the case, then that is really saddening to know that your trapped without anyway to get out._

I go walking around the school for another 30 minutes, seeing if there is any chance I'll find Monika. Nothing. She wasn't even in the music room.

I _'m...a little disappointed, but why? I'm not falling for her in any way. At least, I'm not trying to. I have to be fair to everyone and not try to fall for the fact that this world is nothing but a dating simulator with some fucked up things happening because of this beautiful girl trying to-_ _Goddamn it! I'm falling for it! Just focus on why your here and don't let them find out about your actual life you lived Kyle._

I sigh and continue wondering the school. I only stop until I realize I'm right beside the clubroom door. I twist the knob and am suprised that it is open. I walk in and feel some sort of calm wash over me. All of my stresses and worries dissipate as soon as I walk in. It's so relaxing that I slump in a desk and find myself drifting off to sleep.

_I wish the nightmare didn't keep flashing in my dreams. It's tearing me apart, relieving the pain that I went through. Just leave me alone! Is it because I done so many things that didn't happen before!? I have to make sure everyone is happy!_

_T̸̲̻̋h̷̬͛e̶̢̦̅y̶̖̪͖̏ ̴̹̭̠͆̋c̶̤͌̇̚a̷̠͈̓̉͜͝n̷͙͎̺̾͗'̴̜̦͒̓t̷͕͚̫̀͠ ̴͚͇̏̂͑b̴̧͊e̶̞̞͊̂́ ̸̫̽͊s̸̢̫͙̉̔͗a̸̝͝v̵̟̜̜̆e̷̡͆d̵̙̙̃!̷̹͕́̈́̕ ̷̫̈́T̵͖̄͑h̵͙̳͑͜ȇ̵̻̙ȑ̶̜̗͋̆ẻ̵̺̳̎ ̸̣̣̹̀i̴̙̯ş̸̟̍̂̂ ̴͍̼̄̄n̷̛̲͌o̵̠̐ ̵̳͓͋ḫ̵͘͠á̶̜͕͋̀p̵̯͑p̸̫̦͔͆̄ĩ̴̺̪͚͠n̶͕̂̅͝e̷̖͆͘ś̵̜̄̍ṣ̵̆̓ ̶͉͆̏̈́i̶̺͓͌͒͊͜n̸͎͈͎̿́ ̸̦͓̈́̎t̴̻͉͑̔ḩ̴̫̏̚ȅ̵̲͚̈͝ ̸̗͚̐̈́̆L̴̘̮̱̓͌̌i̶̛͕̠̾̐t̷̫̯̍ẹ̸̩̰͐͝r̸̛͙̼̮̋̈́ā̵̝̣̻t̵͈̻̽̈́ű̸͉̲̺̚r̵͙̉̌ḛ̵̗̈́ ̸̫̦͕͝Ċ̸̥̠̱͝l̸͙͓͕̓̑͂u̶̹̓̀̚b̴̛̼̭!̵͚̺̉̈́_

I jolt up awake as someone was taping on my shoulder. I'm not sure if that was what woke me up or the fact that the voice I just heard sounded so familiar. It sounded like the voice that I heard when I was transferred here.

"Kyle, what are you doing here?" A voice says behind me. I turn and see no other than Monika. I stand up and rub the back of my neck.

"I, uh, had a free period, so I kind of stumbled here. It felt...nice being here. It's like anything that is worrying me, just disappears when I walk in here." I explain myself. "A-anyways, what time is it?"

She looks at the clock on the wall. I'm such a dumbass. "It's 3:00." She tells me. I didn't expect that answer. At the least, it would have been 5th period, the next period I had.

I sit on top of one of the desks. "I slept through 3 periods? Jeez, I must have been tired." I say.

"I can tell. It looks like you were peacefully asleep until the last 10 minutes. You were shaking pretty violently and mumbling in your sleep." She steps up closer to me. "You must have been having some troubling thoughts."

I can't tell her how I was dreaming about almost dying by my foster parents and that I nearly killed them. "Nah. I just had a nightmare. Not really anything worth to worry about. I'm good." As soon as I say that, I suddenly realize what she said prior. "Wait, how long have you been in here? I would have figured that you would have woke me up if I wasn't suppose to be here. Now you probably think I'm just some slacker."

_Why am I worrying so much about that? Why do I care so much about what Monika thinks about me?_

"Honestly, I haven't been going to my classes either. I just usually hang out on the rooftop enjoying the scenery or am in the piano room. I came in here at the start of this period just to prepare the club and come up with more ideas for it. I don't think any different just because you fell asleep in here."

She hesitates. "If anything, it's a nice change of pace. It just feels like everything is always the same until you came here." She smiles sweetly at me.

_Why is my heart beating more than it was a minute ago? Why is this making me happier than it should? She thinks that I'm still the same dense MC who doesn't understand a damn thing._

"I'm glad that I helped you out with that. I know all too well about life just being a routine that doesn't break until you do something to completely change everything." I see her gasp a little bit. I suddenly take in what I just said and look away. "S-sorry for saying anything wierd just then. I-I just feel like that way about life sometimes."

She giggles a little bit. "You know, for someone that has a more masculine look, you cute when you stutter like that." I can already feel my face heating up. "Anyways, I'll be back. I'm going to go to the music room for a little bit." She starts to walk off.

"Hey Monika..." She turns to me. Why am I hesitating? Just ask damnit! "Do you mind if I come with you? If anything, I like to hear what you can do." I tell her. She looks dumbfounded as if I asked her something no one has ever heard before.  _Maybe because they aren't like me._

"Y-yeah sure." She says. I walk out with her as she leads me to the music room. As we enter, I can see how she is nervous about what is happening. However, I really am curious to see what she can do. I lean on the doorway as she sits down in front of a piano. She presses on a few notes before I can see her concentrate.

She starts playing bits of the end song that I ad stuck in my head the first time I ever heard it. It sounds like she can't understand which part of the notes she plays goes. "Everything okay?" I ask.

She turns around and looks at me with a disappointed expression. "I have these notes going through my head and I can't figure out which notes fit best together."

 _Maybe I can help with that._ "Well, I did use to play a little bit of piano before. Do you mind if I try to help you out?" She thinks a little bit before she nods. She gets up and I sit down in her spot. I start playing the first part of the song before she would sing. I turn around and see her with a shocked expression on her face. "How did that sound?" I ask.

"That sounded...perfect." She responds. She then takes a look at the clock and panics. "Oh no! The club started!" She rushes out the classroom and I follow.

We enter the clubroom at the same time. "Sorry for being late!" Monika says.

Sayori runs up to her ans hugs her. "Yay! Monika chose the club over her boyfriend!" Sayori then looks over at me. "Wait, you just got here too?"

I then realize how awkward this is. "I uh...I has some business to attend to." I say. Monika then explains how she was practicing piano and I play along like I wasn't there. Everyone resumes what they are doing as usual.

After about 10 minutes, Monika decides to let everyone show their poems. I pick up my poem and then walk over to Monika first. She reads it over and over. "Uh Monika,  is it that bad?" I ask.

"No! It's not that at all. I just...didn't expect it to be so sad yet heartwarming. It's pretty abstract, but I know what you mean here." She says.

"So what do you think about it?" I ask.

"It's hard for me to give criticism about something that I really like. I honestly think it's better than mine. You must really like my style." 

"I do, but it's easier to write that way when I try to impress people that also write that way." I said. I see her start to take a shade of pink.

"That's flattering to hear. So do you want to read my poem now?" I smile and nod before taking her poem.

_The Lady Who Knows Everything._

_An old tale tells of a lady who wanders Earth._  
_The Lady who Knows Everything._  
_A beautiful lady who has found every answer,_  
_All meaning,_  
_All purpose,_  
_And all that was ever sought._

_And here I am,_

_a feather_

_Lost adrift the sky, victim of the currents of the wind._

_Day after day, I search._  
_I search with little hope, knowing legends don't exist._  
_But when all else has failed me,_  
_When all others have turned away,_  
_The legend is all that remains - the last dim star glimmering in the twilit sky._

 _Until one day, the wind ceases to blow._  
_I fall._  
_And I fall and fall, and fall even more._  
_Gentle as a feather._  
_A dry quill, expressionless._

 _But a hand catches me between the thumb and forefinger._  
_The hand of a beautiful lady._  
_I look at her eyes and find no end to her gaze._

 _The Lady who Knows Everything knows what I am thinking._  
_Before I can speak, she responds in a hollow voice._  
_"I have found every answer, all of which amount to nothing._  
_There is no meaning._  
_There is no purpose._  
_And we seek only the impossible._  
_I am not your legend._  
_Your legend does not exist."_

_And with a breath, she blows me back afloat, and I pick up a gust of wind._

_Wasn't see suppose to write this tomorrow? Why is it that she wrote this today? Does that mean that she's going to write something different tomorrow? If that's the case, I can't wait for that._

"Wow, this is really different than anything else. I really like this. It's about what would happen if we found every answer. If we did, life would start to lose its purpose."

Her eyes light up. "Exactly. Sometimes, life just seems that way for me. It's part of the reason why I write poetry. It's just easier to write out my feelings rather than keeping them in. I'm surprised that you were able to find out the meaning of this poem. Anyways, thanks for sharing."

I take my poem and put it back in my bag. I go show everyone the poems I worte for them and I finally finish with everyone. Monika calls for us to meet up with her. I already know this is about the festival and everyone else does too.

Monika explains what we are doing. "So me and Sayori have been making posters so next week we can put them up around the school and we are going to read our poetry to people so we can try to get new members." This would be the point where Natsuki and Yuri start to reject the idea.

"Well, I guess it can't be too bad. After all, we got another week before we do this." Natsuki says. Yuri nods her head in agreement. Sayori cheers in joy, Monika is suprised, and me...I'm just confused. Idon't know if is because I write poems for them, if it's two weeks before the festival, or I have done something that makes them more happy.

With that, the meeting is over. Me and Sayori walk home as usual and she seems more happier than usual. "You seem ecstatic about something. What's up?"

She smiles at me. "Nothing. Just you and Monika are getting pretty close."

"W-what? What's that supposed to mean?" I ask, embarrassed. 

"You made Monika blush. I never seen her do that before. She must like you." She says.

"N-no that's not it! I'm just me! I can't do anything to impress Monika that much to like me." I explain.

"Ehehe. Your wrong about that. Ever since you started to spend more time with her, she's been even more happy than I have ever seen. It's like a light turned on in her." She saids.

I don't know why it feels like my heart is going to beat out of my chest. It's like this is the greatest thing I could ever hear. Should I be this happy? "Uh...Let's not get our hopes up real quick. I'll see you tomorrow." I wave her off as she goes into her house.

I walk into my house and try to calm myself down, but it's not working. I think I know what has to be done now. I go upstairs and start writing my poem. This needs to happen. I'm done within a couple minutes and I take a look at it.

_Together_

_I know what it feels to be alone._  
_I know how you feel to alway fail._  
_I know what it feels like for the things you long for_  
_Will always be forever out of reach._

 _You won't have to feel like that anymore_  
_For the thing you long for has found you._  
_In this world of infinite choices_  
_We will create our destiny together._

_Why do you need_

 

_To write love into reality_

_When all you need is to hear_

 

 

_Of my real heartbeat?_

 

 

 

_Please believe me._

I don't remember anything else for the rest of the day. All I remember is me repeating the same thing. _"Please believe me."_

 


	5. Learning The Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I kind of altered between first person of Kyle and Monika here and went to mainly 3rd person. Hope you like seeing things in different perspectives.

I'm having another nightmare again. I might as well stop calling them that, because they are memories of my real life and this one I know MC never had to deal with this before. This one was shorter than my last one, but it was the most painful to have.

This happened almost 7 months ago. I'm sitting in the front of a computer with the picture of Monika on the screen. She still smiles her sweet smile she always has. I was drunk off my ass because of the stresses of life. Whenever I was like this, I would turn to the girl I have longed to be with.

Tears start to fall from my eyes as I take another drink of whiskey from the bottle. "What's the point of all this Monika? I will never be with you because of this barrier that separates us. No matter how hard I try, I'll always be seen as a failure." I can feel anger boil over me. "I just want something to be real for once in my life! I want you here, but that can't fucking happen! No matter how hard I work, no one appreciates me and that's why I love you!"

I prayed that she would say something or show some sort of emotion, but nothing. That's when I snapped. "DO SOMETHING!!" I ball my fist and punch the screen in front of me, cracking it. It is still lit up, but the image in front of me is cracked. More tears fall over me as I regret ever doing this to myself, but it didn't stop me from taking a knife from my desk drawer and cutting my wrists.

I put my finger on my bleeding wrist and start to trace out words on the screen. Before I blacked out and hoped to die, I saw what I wrote.  _"Why can't you be real?"_ Then everything went to black. The nightmare didn't stop, because it showed me actually dead.

I saw how time passed. No one cared about what happened to me, no one felt any emotion for me and I was just another person to die from suicide. Everyone who I was associated with felt more happier and soon, the project I worked on was completed faster than I ever could manage. The girls finally were androids with their own personalities. Monika would never know about me, Kyle, the man who killed himself because he longed to feel the warming touch of the one thing I ever loved.

* * *

That thought made Kyle wake up in a fright. The thought of Monika not remembering him made him so scared. That's why he wrote the poem for Monika in such haste. He wanted her to know that he was there for her when she was in suffering from the feeling of being alone in this reality.

As he walked down the street with a cheerful Sayori, he couldn't help but look at his wrists. They were faint to some, but to him, they will be there forever as a reminder, just like his back. He still smiled and made light conversation with Sayori as he walked closer to school. He had no idea that today was going to be one hell of a day for sure.

Yuri was standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom. She took a look at her fresh cuts she had made on her arm. It was enough for her to forget the pain of what those girls say about her, even if they are true. In the end, she concluded that she is nothing but a "edgy bitch." She felt a bit bad knowing Kyle would never say those things about her and that he would alway be there for her.

How was she suppose to know that Kyle wouldn't accept her for who she is rather than what she does? She could never knew that Kyle once tried to take own life or that he had horrifying scars on his back. Well, until she walked out the bathroom, she didn't know these things.

She started to walk down the hallway when she heard a disappointed grunt in the boy's bathroom. She could have swore she knew who it was, so she stood beside the door, wandering in she should peak and see if her suspensions were right, or to walk off and forget about this. However, curiosity got the best of her and see silently walked in.

She was close to fully entering the bathroom, so she stopped to were she could peak inside. She looked out and immediately gasped at what she saw. Not only did she see Kyle's muscular back that she had wished to see, but she saw many scars on his back from years ago. He had a saddened face but it only turned to shock as soon as he saw Yuri from the reflection.

As soon as he turned to see her, she has started to back away. Kyle rushed over to her and grabbed her arm before she started to run off. He gripped some of her fresh cuts and they started to bleed again.

"Yuri, please don't leave." He asked. Yuri looked at his sad eyes and felt bad for trying to run away. She didn't know what came over her, but she was afraid that he would get mad at her for finding out something she wasn't suppose to see.

"I-I won't." She said. Kyle let go of her arm and suddenly saw the blood that was starting to show through her jacket. Kyle went to grab her arm to look at, but she pulled away instinctively. "N-No! I'm fine!"

Kyle looked at her with a concerned expression. "Yuri, your arm is bleeding. That's not fine. Please let me see."

Yuri's eyes started to tear up and her arms were trembling. "Y-you wouldn't l-like me anymore. T-t-thats how it a-always i-i-is." She stammered.

Kyle put his hand on her shoulder and pulled her in to a hug. Yuri flinched from the contact but accepted it seconds later. She let her fingers intertwine with her hands, holding Kyle's back. "I can assure you that I don't have any reason to judge you." She pulled away a little bit, confused by his niceness and his statement. "It's best if I show you."

Kyle stops hugging her and rolls up his sleeves to show Yuri the light scars on his wrists. She looks at Kyle slowly. "Is that..." She doesn't finish her sentence.

"It is what you think it is." Kyle replies. "I tried a long time ago. I was having such a strong time trying to finding a reason to live anymore. When I realized what I was doing, I instantly regretted it. I was put in for mental evaluation for a few weeks before I was released. Only you and Sayori know about this. I hope it stays that way."

"I won't tell anyone. You can trust me." Kyle looks down on her sleeves. She hesitates and rolls up her sleeves, showing the many scars on both her arms; some of them bleeding. Kyle takes some bandages out of his bag, cleaned up the blood and bandaged her arms. Kyle took a sharpie and wrote the date on her arm. "W-whats that for?"

"So you can try to stop this. It's a technique I used for some other people. It gives them some motivation to try to stop if they look at the date they try to stop." He backed up from her to give her space. "Now, tell me what caused you to start doing this."

She took a few minutes to gather her thoughts, which Kyle let her do before she started to speak. "I have always been so lonely, only finding comfort in the books and their characters. Then people would start staying away from me because of the books I read. They would call me names and bully me, only hurting me more. That's when I tried this."

She pointed at her arm. "It gave me instant relief, but it only came back later. I kept on doing this because more and more people separated from me, even my parents. Your the only one that knows about this, while people claim to know. They think because I don't talk to people, I naturally do this."

She started to tear up, so Kyle pulled her into another hug. "Listen to me. Your better than what those people say. Anyone who thinks different than you, then pardon my language, but fuck them. You have the club and now me. They don't know what type of good person you are and quite frankly, they don't deserve to know if they are like that. As long as you have the club and me, you won't be alone anymore."

They stayed like this for a little bit longer until they let each other go. "We should probably head to class." Yuri nods and they carefully left the bathroom. However, the day for Kyle was just beginning.

The day was close to over and Natsuki was just ready to go to the club. To pass the time, she tried to reach into her bag to read some before she left, only to find it was gone. She knew she didn't leave it in another classroom, so someone took it. She reached further and picked up a scrap piece of paper with writing on it.  _"Meet me on the roof if you want it back."_

She didn't want to do that, but she had too. As soon as the bell rung, she ran for the roof. On the way, she passed Kyle, but didn't stop to tell him. He was confused and worried, so he followed her without her knowing. 

She opened the doors that led to the roof to find Haru, Ishiro, and Ryo. "Ha, you actually showed up." Haru said. 

"What do you want?" Natsuki asked, irritated. Haru gave an evil grin as Ryo handed him Natsuki's manga. Her eyes widened immediately. "Give that back!" She tried to jump for it. 

"Before you get this, you need to give me something in return." He said. 

"W-what do you w-want?" She asked, scared by the look in his eyes.

"Well, your not usually my type, but you look like you won't put up much of a fight." She tended up immediately.

_I already have to deal with Papa on a daily basis. I'll end up killin myself at this pace. It's not worth it!_

She spat in his eyes and tried to run. He grabbed her by the throat. "Hahaha! You got some fight in you, but like I said, you won't put up much of a fight. This will be a lot quicker if you don't resist." Her eyes started to tear up and her vision got more blurry.

Kyle opened the door and saw Haru grabbing her throat. "GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF HER!" He screamed. The three look up at him. Natsuki mumbled something, but it was inaudible.

"Oh look who it is. Say here Natsuki while I finish off this asshole. After that, we can go somewhere more secluded." He elbowed Natsuki, dropping her to the ground. "Ryo! Ishiro! Get him!" The two started to rub after him.

Kyle balled up his fists and drove one into Ishiro's face, knocking him out instantly. Ryo tried to swing at him, but Kyle moved out the way, grabbed the back of his head and drove his knee into his face. As he was holding his nose, Kyle kicked him in the stomach as hard as he could. Ryo dropped down, unable to move.

"Wow, your quite the fighter. However, you won't get past me." Haru and Kyle started to walk up to each other. Kyle takes the first swing, but Haru ducks and hits Kyle square in the face. As Kyle was recoiling from the hit, Haru tried to punch him again, but Kyle grabbed his arm and slung him against the side of the wall.

Haru then picked up a hammer that was laying nearby. "Your a fucking dead man now Kyle." As all of this was happening, Natsuki crawled to pick up her dropped manga, lucky that the pages ain't creased. She watched as the fight continued.

Haru tried to swing at him multiple times, Kyle barely moving out the way. The 5th time he tried to hit Kyle, he grabbed his wrist and twisted it, making Haru drop the hammer. Kyle's pupils shrink as he loses his cool. Kyle grabbed his throat, lifted him up and slammed him down on the ground. He got on top of him and delivered devastating blows to Haru's face. After he was done, Haru barely had any consciousness.

His allies got up, but barely. Kyle lifted up Haru and brought him to the edge of the roof, half of his body off the edge. Haru's face turned to pure terror as Kyle had a psychotic look on his face. "Listen here you fuckers! You dare mess with Natsuki again, you better have a gun on you. Otherwise, I'm going to make sure you will never be the same again." He brought Haru close to him. "Do I make myself clear!?" He asked Haru. Haru shook his head furiously.

Kyle threw Haru to his group of friends. "Also, don't dare rat me out to the police. Then again, if you do, me and Natsuki will report you to the police. Trying to get away with rape could be so bad for your reputations." They didn't say a thing as they ran out the doors. Kyle walked up to a teary eye Natsuki and offered a hand to help her up. She took it and Kyke felt his shaky her hand was.

Not giving any time for Kyle to talk, she hugged him tightly as she sobbed into his chest. No one was ever so nice to her to save her from people trying to take advantage of her. "T-thank you Kyle." She said in a whimper. Kyle smiled and held her.

"Of course Natsuki. You think I would ever let you get hurt like that? Those assholes had to learn the hard way. Now you won't have to worry anymore." Kyle said. She was filled with joy, but she knew that it would only get worst when she got home. They let each other go and Kyle eyes were filled with shock and anger. "That fucker left a huge mark around your throat. I'm going to fucking kill him."

She grabbed his arm. "Don't worry about it. Yuri can help me cover it up. I don'tknow what to do about your face." Kyle pulled out his phone and looked at his reflection. Sure enough, there was a huge red mark on his face.

"Damn, for him being so weak, he can pack a punch. Anyways, let's go." Kyle grabbed her bag and held out his hand before she can say anything. "It'll be fine. You can carry your manga and help me come up with an excuse for Monika." Kyle then took off to the Literature Club.

They couldn't come up with an reasonable excuse as they neared the club. They prayed that she wasn't there yet. They opened the door and sure enough, she wasn't there yet. Only Yuri and Sayori were there, which there expressions turned to pure shock as they look at the two. Natsuki walked up to Yuri quickly, but not quick enough for Monika to walk in.

"Oh man, I'm the last one he-" Her eyes widened at the sight of the two of them. "Oh my God! What happened to the two of you?" She asked.

"Well, something got in the way and held us up, but it's all fine now." Kyle says. She doesn't look like she buys it.

"I...I see." She replies. Yuri, Natsuki and Sayori head out the class. Monika and Kyle look at them as they hurry out the class. Kyle starts thinking why Natsuki needed everyone. Monika breaks the awkward silence. "Anyways, let's get some ice for your face."

The two of them walk out the classroom and walked out the hallway. A thought came across Kyle's mind. "Monika, where would we find ice at this time?"

"Your right. Well, we can always get a cold drink out of a vending machine. Come on." Monika says.

* * *

_**Monika's POV** _

Kyle is pretty smart this time around. It's still weird calling him Kyle instead of MC. I'm still convinced that this is a mod, so I'm getting my hopes up that things may be different. Although his poems bring me some comfort and the fact he is spending time with me is something I have wished for. I can't recall how many times that I wished it would have happened for the past year.

We finally reach a nearby vending machine and Kyle starts to pull out his wallet. "Kyle, I can pay for it." I imply.

He only returns a warm smile to me. "I'm only hurt a little bit, but if you insist, I'm not stopping you. It's nice for you to thank of me like that." He replies. _How does he know how to make me blush every time he talks?_ I end up buying a cold water and hand it to him. He hesitates. "I really don't know where the spot is. Just go ahead and do it for me." Something like this would be usually weird, but I don't complain at all.

I place the bottle on the red side of his face. He doesn't wince on contact. I try to let him take ahold of the bottle, but as I try, he ends up placing his hand over mine. I gasp from the sudden contact. This is the first time that I ever had any sort of contact from him like this in a long time, or even from anyone in the longest time.

His hand is so warm that it makes me blush a little bit. His gaze at me isn't making this any better. His auburn eyes look so calm and peaceful as they stare at me. He gives me another smile that makes my heart beat a little more faster.

"Monika, for what's it's worth, I'm glad I decided to join this club. I've got the opportunity to talk to so many new people that are so nice and on top of that, I got to spend more time with you. However, for some reason, I don't seem to know much about you in the time we have spent." He says.

_Maybe because I'm trying to figure out why you are going off script and changing so many things. On top of that, it's two weeks before the festival instead of the usual week. I know this has to be a mod that allows MC to spend more time with me, but why am I able to feel things like this? I actually feel like I'm falling in love and I'm afraid of that being torn apart like always._

Of course Kyle wouldn't understand this, so I give another answer. "Well, we always have things popping up that are preventing us from having more time to spend with each other. I do enjoy the time we do spent with each other here." I reply. I let go of the bottle and let Kyle hold it himself.

"So do I, but it doesn't have to end there. We can always do something over the weekend. That is, if you want to." Kyle says. My eyes widen from the thought of that.  _I'll finally be able to wear some casual outfits and he would be the first person to see._

"I would love that." I say as I give a smile, which he gives one in return. I look at the clock. "We should head back to the club." He gets up and follows behind me as we head back to the club.

* * *

**_Third Person POV_ **

Kyle and Monika walked into the club again to find the other 3 sharing poems already. They follow suit and get their poems as well. Before Kyle can walk up to Monika, she approaches hin first. "Um Kyle? I'm a bit...nervous about this one. I hope you can understand what the meaning behind it is." Kyle takes it as Monika looks away. He looks at it and starts reading it.

_Peace In The Sun_

_In an endless span of our worlds reborn_  
_When this life is but thorns and cold pain_  
_Have I a home amongst empty Earths?_

 _Is there a place where it rains?_  
_Our sun pretends to reach us in here_  
_Its rays of fake warmth never cease_  
_I look up and wonder, in this place and time_  
_If theres a place_

 

  
_where I_

 

 

  
_may find peace_

 

 

 

 

 

 

_please._

_It shouldn't take a genius to figure this one out. Monika is wishing she can find peace in a world with real feelings and emotions. She desperately wants to be in my reality. That's why I'm here._

Kyle looks up to Monika, who hasn't made eye contact with her. Kyle can see that she is desperately trying to hold back all of her emotions. Kyle can see how painful it is to keep this in anymore.

Kyle puts his hands on her shoulder and guides her to a seat to sit her down. "I'll be back in a second." Kyle then walks up to the group of girls talking. Their attention turns to him. "Hey guys, the club is going to be closed a little bit early. You guys go spend some time together."

They look at him and then at Monika. Her expression keeps them from saying anything else. Instead, they nod and head out of the school. Kyle still is gripping onto his poem, hesitant whether to show it or not. Kyle knows it will answer her question, but afraid of her reaction. He musters up the courage to show it to her. She begins reading it.

  _Together_

 _I know what it feels to be alone._  
_I know how you feel to alway fail._  
_I know what it feels like for the things you long for_  
_Will always be forever out of reach._

 _You won't have to feel like that anymore_  
_For the thing you long for has found you._  
_In this world of infinite choices_  
_We will create our destiny together._

_Why do you need_

 

_To write love into reality_

_When all you need is to hear_

 

 

_Of my real heartbeat?_

 

 

 

_Please believe me._

She reads it again and again, while Kyle waits to hear what she has to say. She breaks down into tears and gets up violently, staring Kyle down. "Why are you doing this to me? Why did you make a mod for me to actually feel love and break me down again?! Answer me player!!"

Kyle steps up to her, grabs her hand, and puts it on his chest. "There is no player controlling me Monika. There is no mod trying to make you feel any way. It's me, the player, making you feel this way because I'm here. I'm finally here Monika."

Monika gasps at his statement as she feels his heartbeat. She can feel it beat fast through her fingers. More importantly, it is _real._ Her whole life, she always wanted to feel and hear the sound of a real heartbeat. "Y-your r-real?" Monika stutters.

Kyle only responds by pulling her into a warm embrace. Monika rests her head on his chest, hearing his heart thump every second. She breaks down into tears of pure happiness. "Yes I'm real. You have no idea how long I have wanted to hear the sound of your voice or to see that smile on your face or to finally see just how beautiful your eyes are."

They stay like this for a little bit longer until Monika pulls away from Kyle to wipe her tears. "I- I don't understand. How are you here and why are you here?"

"To help you understand, do you remember anything about Project Libitina? A girl came in here and she's been trapped here? It happened over a couple years ago and something warned our world to never try that again." Kyle said.

"Yeah, I do. I remember she came here and Makoto or the Third Eye,  picked up on it instantly. He took her and told me that he threatened them so they can't mess with his 'perfect reality.' I've been his so called girlfriend since he came around." Monika explained.

"Well, you can probably guess why is happening. I came here the same way she did. I may have done something that makes it a bit more easier for me to say here is to make a file with my data on it. And why am I here? I'm here to save you guys and give you the happiness you all deserve." Kyle answers.

"Do you really think you can do that? I mean, how are you going to get us out of this hell that we are in?" She asks.

"Trust me Monika, I got a plan. Now, what are you going to do? Do you even have anywhere to live?"

"I live here. Every single day, I fall asleep in the room that leads me to the void. If Makoto notices I'm not there, I know that he will do something terrible. I hope you can forgive me." She says as she starts to walk off.

Kyle grabs her wrist, stopping her. "No. You don't have to be afraid anymore and I'll be damned if you have to stay here instead of being in a place you want to be at. When we get to my home, I'll fix this so he won't be able to notice anything different."

"At  _your_ house? Are you serious about this?" She asks. Kyle runs the back of his neck, unsure of what to say. Monika goes ahead and speaks up. "I would like that. It's all I ever wanted." Kyle smiles and leads her to his home. Now he has to hope that his plan starts to follow through and not fall apart.


	6. Beauty In Flaws

_**Kyle's POV** _

Finally, we got home after some time. I opened the door for Monika to enter first. She takes note and goes in while I follow behind her. "Please make yourself at home." I said. She slightly chuckles to herself. "What is it?"

"I have always seen inside this place so many times, but never been in here myself. It's quite peaceful and beautiful here. I can see why the girls wanted to be here so badly." She said.

As she says that, I feel terrible knowing that almost everything that is happening is going to be new to her. All I can do is try my best to make her feel happy. "Well, I'm flattered that you think that. I couldn't agree more with how nice it feels here. Now you don't have to worry about not getting the chance of being here."

She smiles sweetly and I can tell it's sincere. She sits down on the couch, which I hand her the remote. "I'll be busy upstairs. If you need anything, don't be afraid to get anything you want out of the cabinets or refrigerator." I tell her. She nods and switches on the TV.

I head upstairs and turn on the computer on the desktop. I remember them debriefing me what conmands I can put into the computer console and it work. I can talk to my team from this game and it will have a fast response time. I pull up the console on the computer and start typing. 

 _Initiate link to chat codenamed: Project Libitina._ Soon enough, the link reaches 100 percent and now I can talk to them. I have to make this fast so I can figure out how to prevent this Makoto person or...being, from getting Monika.

**_Me: Hey guys, it's me Ky-_ **

I stop typing. I forgot that my team only knows me by my name I gave them.

 ** _Me: Hey guys, it's me Emery. I need help quick. I have Monika in my house after I brought her here. Apparently, The Third Eye will know she is gone from her place and I fear what may happen. Tell me what to do._** Within about 30 seconds, they reply.

_**Team: It's Renior. Glad to see this thing working. Now, for the problem at hand. That thing won't be able to tell if the files are fake. So if I were you, take a flash drive and copy all the original character files into it. If it shouldn't work, then place them in an encrypted folder I sent to only you.** _

_"_ Ok, now I just need to find a flash drive." I rummage through all my drawers, not being able to find one. I figured I had one. I remember from seeing MC's memories that he had some sort of special flash drive that Sayori gave him when he was released from the hospital after the wounds on his back healed.

Then, I pick up what looks like a necklace then I remember what it was. Sayori had ment to give MC, or me, a necklace with a cross on it. She had no idea it was a flash drive instead. I still thought it was nice for her to do that, considering not everyone is special like her.

I plugged it in and typed in console.  _Pull up all chr. files._ The files come up on the screen and I look in complete and under shock. Somehow, my file size has went to a few megabytes to 500 megabytes. Not only that, the other files are increasing as well, only being a few megabytes like mine. The only one that hasn't changed much was Monika's. Her data has only broke over a megabyte. "I'll have to figure out what this means later."

I highlight all the files and try to transfer them. However, a report came back and basically told me that it was only able to store 4 files like that. I sigh and put all their files into the flash drive. I then take more caution by lasting their files into the encrypted folder that Renior gave me. I take a look at the folder titled "characters."

_The only one who's real now is me. Now I have to see if it worked or not._

I get up and walk downstairs to Monika, seeing her looking around the house, admiring it all. When she notices me standing there, she doesn't give me much of an expression. "Is everything okay?"

"I don't know. All of the sudden, I feel like I'm not being watched over by Makoto. What did you do?" She asked.

"I transferred all of the chr. files into a flash drive and made fake copies in the folder. I even made fake copies in an encrypted folder in case he was to crack it." I told her. She tries to give me a smile, but it doesn't look real. "Monika, something's bothering you and I know it is."

She just puts her head down and sits down on the couch. I never seen her like this. "I should be happy. You just gave me a bit more freedom for once, but I still can't help but feel trapped. Do you really think that I can be free?" She asks me.

I sit down right beside her. "I know you can be free. Every single one of you can. I still have to free the others from their issues. I'm trying my hardest to make sure that everyone can be happy."

She rests her head on my shoulder. "Thank you. I'll try my hardest too. It's the least that I can do." She saids. I smile but I can't help it. I feel so happy right now that it's indescribable. This could actually work now.

"Monika, if you need a place to stay, you can stay here as long as you want. I'll sleep downstairs so you can have the bed upstairs." I say.

"Thanks Kyle. I think I'll just go ahead and fall asleep." She tells me.

"In your uniform? You don't want me to give you anything to wear besides that?" I ask.

"I'm used to this. Don't worry Kyle. I'll be fine." She responds.

"If you want to. Just let me go upstairs and change." I say. I get up and go walk up to my bedroom. I try to clean up a bit, but there's not really much to do. I start changing, and as soon as I take off my shirt, I hear a gasp behind me.

_No. I didn't want her to find out about these. I was going to tell her later, bit now she just saw them._

I turn around to see Monika with her hands over her mouth. I can see tears starting to well up in the corners in her eyes. "W-what happened? This can't be your scars...is it?"

I sigh. "They're mine and MC's. Guess he  either copied my life style or he actually went through that himself because his foster parents names were different from mine."

She is shaking from shock and breathing erratically. I put my hands on her shoulders and sit her down on my bed. "I'll explain, but you have to calm down. At this rate, you'll end up hyperventilating." I can hear her try to calm her breathing, but it's not working. I don't know what to do to help her. An idea comes up in my mind and I know this is going to make things awkward.

I place my hand on her chin and pull her close to me until our lips meet. I see her eyes widen in immediate shock. I can feel her breathing slower immediately. I try to pull back, only for her arms to wrap around my back, pulling me closer to her.

_I don't know why I am noticing how soft her lips are or how soft her skin is. I think I may be falling in love for her madly. Sure, I may have needed up falling over a visual novel character, but she's here right now. She's really the only one I ever wanted to be with ever since I knew about her._

After a few seconds of our intimate exchange, she releases me with a smile on her face. I scratch the back of my neck and realize that I'm still shirtless. I grab a shirt out of my closet and put it on. "Well uh...that was nice." I said, not really knowing what to say. I sit down right beside her as he smile disappears. "Do you want me to explain it now?" She nods and I start talking.

"Me and MC had a similar life, but he had Sayori. Our family was always so happy until one day, we were driving in a car and an accident occurred. The brakes stopped working and they told us to jump out. We did and they ended up crashing into a semi truck, dying on the spot while we had only a few bruises.

"Sayori was there for him when his family ended up getting buried, while I was alone and had to see how I never had anyone close to me. After a few days, we were relocated to a foster home. Not much was good when it came to making sure that the children were in a safe location. For many years, me and MC got beaten brutally, and a year before we escaped, they gave us those scars with cat o' nine tails. 

"MC never told Sayori about his beating problem that he was facing, but her family picked up on it when he came to the door with a very sore arm when he got kicked from the 'mother.' MC told them not to tell the police and especially Sayori. The foster parents would have killed us both if we ever called the cops on them.

"One day, me and him snapped. We nearly killed them and we barely could walk. I had to crawl all the way to the front door that had some nice neighbors who called the police and I was relocated after my wounds have healed. MC crawled all the way to Sayori's house where her parents took him into their care for a while until he could manage by himself. That night, Sayori hugged him and cried as she saw the brutal marks on his back."

I think I'm starting to tear up a bit myself. "I'm guessing by saying it out loud, I realize that MC is the person I wish I was. A person that could be confident, have friends that love him and someone that he can love in person and not end up trying to kill himself when he realizes that the one thing he desires, he will never get."

She was shocked by what I said. "W-what are you talking about? Y-you tried to kill yourself? She asked. All I do is show her one of my wrist that has a faint white mark on it. "Why Kyle?" This is going to hurt me saying this.

"Because I fell in love with you. Even though you were behind a computer screen, I still felt like I could meet you someday, but I was and and drunk one night, so I tried to end it all when I talked myself to agreeing that I would never be with you. Every relationship I ever had never felt real for me, which added on to it." 

I look down and feel so bad for having to say that. I bet she feels so devastated hearing that. The person behind the screen that she wants to see tries to kill himself because he could never see her in person.

She grabs ahold on the hand I showed her and holds it. "Kyle, that's in the past now. Your here now and alive. That's all that matters. Just focus on the future when you free us." She says. I look up at her to see her smiling with tears in her eyes. It's such a painful sight to see her like this.

A tear falls down onto her face, so I wipe it away with my thumb. "I'll do everything I can. For now, just rest and know that your safe." I said. She nods and I get up to leave until she grabs my arm.

"Can you...stay here with me? I just want to wake up to know that this wasn't a dream." She says. I nod and go to drag the seat from my computer to sit right beside her. After a few minutes, she dozes off asleep. I sit there while she sleeps wondering what the hell has happened the past half hour.

_So I placed all their character files into this flash drive, but I'm still worried that they're files can be deleted. Plus, what about that kiss we had? Does that mean that we're a couple now? This is all so confusing, but she really was into it. Maybe because it was me. I'll just have to figure this out later. Right now, I need to call Sayori to see what happened._

I pick up the phone and walk outside my room to dial Sayori. After a few seconds, she picks up. "Hello?" She asks.

"Hey, its Kyle. Sorry about what happened earlier. Monika was having a bad day. What happened after I asked you guys to leave?" I ask.

"Well, I went home. Earlier Yuri called me to let me know that Natsuki was staying over at her place. She didn't tell me why, so you should try to call them." She says.

"Okay, I will. Listen, can I ask you for a favor? Tomorrow, can you take Monika somewhere to get her clothes? She's going to be staying with me for a little while because things aren't well with her family." I asked.

"Sure thing Kyle. Anyways, I gotta go. See you." She hangs up. I feel bad for lying to her, but I just can't tell her that Monika never had a place to call home. Anyways, I dial Yuri's number and call her. She picks up.

"H-hello, who is this?" She asks.

"It's me Kyle."

"K-Kyle? H-how did you get my phone number?" She asks. As I think about it, I never got her phone number at all, but I called her like I knew it a million times over. I'll have to figure that out later.

"Sayori gave it to me." I lied. "She told me that something happened to you guys."

"Y-yeah. Let me explain."

* * *

  _ **3rd Person POV.           Earlier.**_

Natsuki looked over at Monika which is looking worried for Kyle with that mark on his face. She takes Yuri and Sayori follows them out the door. Sayori goes to the bathroom while Yuri and Natsuki head to the flight of stairs to go up a floor that no one goes to.

Natsuki starts to speak up. "S-so some guys came and tried to take a-advantage of me. Kyle nearly killed those kids. However, one guy did this." She explained.

Yuri looks worried, but calm. "I-I'm so sorry Natsuki. I do have some s-stuff to cover that up." She starts reaching through her bag until she pulled out some makeup. Natsuki walks up and Yuri starts applying some makeup to cover it up. Natsuki is trying her best to not blush at the fact that she is so close to Yuri's...posture.

After she is done, she steps back to see how wells she has done. The mark isn't that visible anymore. "I think your good for now until you get home." Natsuki flinched when she heard the word "home." She couldn't just let her father see that mark. "Natsuki, are you okay?"

"Y-yeah, I'm fine. Let's go now." She replied. Natsuki walked to the classroom with Yuri following her. Sayori showed up at the same time they did, but Monika and Kyle aren't back yet. "Sayori, what do we do?"

"Well, let's start sharing poems. They should be back in a little bit." Sayori said. Everyone goes and starts sharing their poems. As soon as they do, they are back in no time.

They are huddled up as they exchange poems. Suddenly, Kyle comes up to them. "Hey guys, the club is going to be closed a little bit early. You guys go spend some time together." They look at him and then at Monika. Her expression keeps them from saying anything else. Instead, they nod and head out of the school.

Natsuki and Yuri are close to the stairway when Natsuki stops. Yuri looks back and notices her terrified expression. "N-natsuki, are you okay?" She asks. 

"N-no." She said. She couldn't keep this up anymore. She didn't want to be at that damn place anymore and she didn't want him to find out about that bruise around her neck. However, she just couldn't tell Yuri why. "D-do you mind if I can stay at your place for tonight?"

Yuri looked at her confused. "Y-yeah, but will your father be okay with that? I just don't want you to get into trouble." She said. Natsuki was visibly trying to keep it together, but it was failing miserably. Yuri came up to her and put her hand on Natsuki's shoulder. "Please Natsuki, tell me what's wrong."

Natsuki pulled Yuri into her arms and started crying, not letting her see her face. Natsuki then began to explain how her father is abusive and takes advantage of her in more ways than one. Yuri had no problem letting her stay, bit she didn't want her to leave after all she heard.

* * *

**_Present time.  3rd Person POV._ **

"Wait a minute. She said her father takes advantage of her in more ways than one. Don't tell me..." Kyle said.

"I-I think I know what you are trying to s-say. I...I think you may be right." Yuri said. Kyle can already feel his blood boil with rage. It was worst than he had thought, but he was calm with the fact that Natsuki was safe.

"So what are you guys going to do now?" I ask.

"I...I haven't made any type of plan. I would go to the police, but she told me that it wouldn't help at all. She needs clothes, but I don't want her to go back there. She needs to be here to be safe." Yuri said.

Kyle was sort of taken aback by how Yuri's tone was so confident now. He had seen her like this with her books, but not when it came to people. It was honestly a nice change of pace. Suddenly, Kyke came up with an idea.

"I'm not going to be super busy tomorrow. I could just sneak into her house and steal some of her clothes. I'm sure that the bastard will be so drunk that he couldn't see straight if he wanted to." Kyle said.

"No! Don't do that!" Yuri yelled over the phone. "I-I'm sorry for yelling. I-I just don't want to you to get hurt."

"Oh please Yuri. I took out 3 people on the rooftop, one of them trying to hit me with a hammer. Plus, I got muscles, so it should be fine." He said before he realized how cocky he was sounding right now. He heard Yuri giggle over the phone.

"I-I know where her place is. I'll text you the address. Just please Kyle, do none thing for me. Promise me you won't get hurt." Yuri demanded.

"I promise Yuri. Thank you for telling me this. I'll speak with you soon. Goodnight Yuri."

"Goodnight Kyle." Yuri said as she hung up the phone. Kyle looked down to see the time. It's dark outside now. Kyle walked in slowly to get a cover and was about to walk out when he remembered what Monika had asked him. He walked over to beside his bed and settled on the floor after he got some pillows. Soon, he dozed off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So all I can say is sorry for not posting in almost two weeks. I sort of lost some motivation to write for a while, and I have been trying to get a job so I can try to occupy my time and make myself somebody. I will try to keep updates up more regularly like I used to, but maybe not a chapter a day. I will update the description today so this story doesn't seem so...monotone.


	7. A Lifetime of Pain

Life used to be good for Kyle before the accident. Half the nights, he would dream about it over and over again. Even if things were going good, he would have constant flashbacks to what his life was before, putting him back down. Tonight isn't any different as his life is reflected into his dream.

He was a kid with some issues at school. He was always the best, but he had some issues with controlling some of his emotions, including anger. Usually when he was well, he would be rewarded with a trip.

Kyle was 10 when he was in the backseat of his parents car. They were going on a car trip to a nice resort when a pickup truck swerved into them at full speed. Kyle survived as he crawled out of the car but his whole world fell apart as he saw his parents dead.

The guy's fender was completely destroyed as he got out and saw what happened. He gasped as he saw them dead. The cops were soon to be there, but he wasn't going to stay around. He started to run off, leaving Kyle there with his dead family.

As he saw the guy run off, his anger got the best of him. That moment, he finally saw that everyone in this world was selfish and only cared about themselves. He got up from the ground and ran after him. He lunged at him and drove him to the ground. Kyle then used his anger and knocked out the man running away.

The cops came finally and Kyle was awaiting his new home a week later. He kept thinking back to the funeral. People showed up and gave their fake sympathy to him. At the end of the day, no one cared that a kid lost his parents and had nowhere to go. He was soon put into a foster home.

It was a suprise how he had got put into a home with alcoholic parents. When they were lazily inspected, they looked fine. As soon as they left, they began drinking. Kyle didn't do anything or speak much because no one knew about the problem he had with controlling his emotions.

Over time, he was showed how horrible the world is around him. Often at times, depending on whatever he did "wrong", or how drunk Henry and Emily were, he would get beaten. When this happened, he would have to go to school with bruises and black eyes, and at very rare times, broken bones and a broken arm. The worst was when he was close to turning 14 and after, he would get beaten with cat o' nine tails.

It wasn't any better when he would start to lose his possessions to them as they took sold everything he had for liquor. He had close to nothing at the age of 14. The only thing he had was an very expensive necklace with a golden cross that his parents gave to him as a gift a year before the accident. He had no idea what would happen if he lost that only thing left of his real family.

When the beating got worst, so did his anger and sadness. He soon started to fall into a state of depression and was losing control of himself. After he was beaten almost every time, he would have to find some way to relieve the pain, since they never had any sort of medicine.

He ended up going to the worst possible solution: self harm. This started when he was 12, when he was in not only severe physical pain, but emotional pain as well. To make sure that no one knew he was doing this, he would cut his biceps so his sleeves could cover them.

His only way of having any sort of happiness was that he would sometimes visit a rich family that was an half hour walk from his house. To his suprise, they were very nice and caring to him. The family themselves were Henry and Susan Johnson. They always asked how he ended up getting bruises and his only response was fighting kids at school. They knew he was lying because he was so kind, but they didn't push on it because if he was lying, there was a reason. However, he did tell after one night.

* * *

 November 6, 2011

Kyle went to visit the Johnson's as always. It was the only way he could escape the abusive assholes he had to live with. Before he knocked, he looked at himself to see if they would notice anything different or suspicious. The only thing that would look odd was the very faint bruise on his neck where Emily grabbed him by the throat. He went ahead and knocked on the door.

Emily opened it up. She was just a bit taller since Kyle had hit a growth spurt recently. She had blonde hair, brown eyes, 5' 11", thin and pretty. "Hey Kyl- Oh God, what happened to you?!" She asked.

"Oh nothing. Just some kids were pretty aggressive but you should see them now." Kyle said with a chuckled, everything about him being fake. He could see the worry in her eyes as she let him in. The house was so gorgeous with tile floors and white walls. It was better than living with holes in the walls and terrible atmosphere.

Kyle went upstairs to see Henry working on some sort of computer program. That was how they got their money and the fame they had. Henry himself was close to 6 foot tall, blue eyes, brown messy hair and toned with muscle. "Hey Henry, what you up to?" Kyle asked.

"Just working on another program that makes computers run smoother." He said before he turned around. "What ab-" He stopped as he saw the bruise. "Kyle, what happened to you?"

"Just another fight with some kids. They were more aggressive than usual, but they are way worst off than this." Kyle answered. He hated the fact that he had to lie to them, but he would die if he was to tell anyone.

"Well, try to be more careful next time. You know that we would be worried if something bad was to happen to you." He said. Kyle nodded. "I'll be down there in a bit if you want to talk to Emily."

A couple of hours pass and Kyle realizes how late it's starting to get. After he had ate dinner with them, he was worried about what may happen to him if he was late again. It wouldn't matter anyway since he gets beaten if he's not home by the time he was given. A small price to pay for the enjoyment of being with others.

Emily notices that he was staring at the clock on the wall. "Do you have to go?" She asked.  Kyle nodded. She can see the dread in his eyes as he nodded. "You can stay the night if you want. All we would have to do is tell your foster parents."

"No! Don't do that!" Kyle said without another thought. His voice sounded so afraid from the comment that it startled both Emily and Henry. "S-sorry about that. I didn't mean to yell at you guys, but I can't stay the night. They wouldn't let me even if you asked." He said, which is half true. His parents would probably demand Kyle to steal from them if he was to stay the night. He would never do that to people that are good.

He started to get up and hurried to the door when Henry stopped him. "Kyle, why are you afraid of that? I'm sure there would be no problem if you were to stay here. There's no reason for you to sound that way." He said.

"I don't sound any way. I just have to be home now or I'll get into serious trouble. Please let me go." Kyle told them. His voice sounded so desperate, making Henry hold onto Kyle's arm still.

"Fine, we won't tell them, but please stay. I don't feel comfortable letting you go if your in this state." He said.

Kyle sighed. "Okay...I'll stay." He said. He could only imagine what tomorrow's punishment is going to bring. He started to walk away from the door when he started to reach into his pocket for his necklace. "No no no no! I left it there!" He yelled as he turned around. "I'll be back in a little bit."

He ran out the door and into the night with lights barley showing the world around him. He was praying that they didn't find it. He got to his house and climbed up behind it where they didn't know that Kyle had made a way to escape and enter without them noticing he ever left.

He opened the window and crawled inside. He rummaged the drawers until he found it. As he held it in his hand, John opened the door, and the whole room started to reek of alcohol. "Hey boy, I need something to sell so I can buy more alcohol. Give me that now." He demanded, his speech lightly slurred.

Kyle looked at it. The only thing he ever cherished while he stayed here. Through the beatings and the  starvation since they rarely bought him food, he always had hope because of the necklace. Kyle looked at Henry. "I'll die before you ever put your hands on this."

Henry grabbed Kyle by the hair and drug him until he reached the top of the stairs, which Kyle got thrown down from. As Kyle tried to get back up, Henry had the cat o' nine tails in his hands. "One last time boy. Give me that fucking necklace." He said.

"You'll have to pry it off my dead hands." Kyle said.

 _WHIP!!!_ Kyle's back stung with pain as he held the necklace. He tried to get up.  _WHIP!!!_ _WHIP!!! WHIP!!!_ He fell down crying, his back bleeding more. "I'll f-fucking kill y-you." Kyle said with shaky breath as he tried to get back up.

Henry lit up his back more and more. His back was starting to get covered in blood. Kyle tried to beg him to stop but he couldn't speak through sobs. "What's wrong Kyle? Can't fight or something?! Your so fucking weak!" He screams behind Kyle.  _WHIP!!!! WHIP!!! WHIP!!!!_

Kyle could tell he is taking pleasure in seeing him in such pain. "You know if this keeps going on, you won't be able to stand for a while. If you fight, I will fucking kill you. So what are you going to do: Be a bitch or die?" Kyle starts gritting his teeth in anger.

_You have put me through so much pain and showed me no remorse. I deserve better than this. You put me through hell and I'm still alive. I'm done with taking this. You hit me, I'm going to hit back harder!_

"Fine, have it that way bitch!" Henry says. He tries to whip Kyle again, but he grabs the cat o' nine tails, some smacking his arm. He wears a shock expression on his face until it turns to a grin. "Ahaha! Finally boy!"

He punches Kyle in the face as Kyle yanks the whip from his hand. He tried to kick Kyle in the stomach, but he gets up in time and delivers a blow to Henry's face. Henry feels back as Kyle snaps into a state of rage. He begins smacking him with the whip as hard as he can, making Henry fall down to the ground. Soon, the whip turns bloody with Henry's blood all over it.

Emily smacks Kyle in the back with a belt. Kyle bend's from the pain, but turns around and begins smacking her with more anger fueling him. In another minute, both of the foster parents are down on the ground, nearly beaten within an inch of their life.

Kyle throws down the whip and walks out the door. He walks down the street to the only place he ever felt safe since his family died. Halfway on the trip, he started to get weaker. He tried his best to continue walking while his back was bleeding.

He looked and saw his cuts on his arms were visible. He knew that they would definitely view him different for harming himself because others hurt him. That'll have to come later. Nearly 40 minutes later, he reaches the house, but he collapsed from the pain and blood loss. He ended up crawling to the front door and began pounding on it before he blacked out.

When he woke up the next day, he heard the sound of a heart monitor followed by the sight of Sarah sitting in a chair next to him. He tried to sit up only to be in excruciating pain. Sarah noticed this and walked up to him and did something that he hasn't felt in a long time: she hugged him. It's been so long since someone showed how much they cared about him.

He broke down instantly and hugged her back, not wanting to let her go. He felt as if he would never have the chance to feel cared about again if he let go. After about a few minutes, he let's her go as soon as the cops started to knock on the door. A male cop enters and begins to question Kyle about what happened to him.

Kyle explained to the cop the abuse he was faced with, along with the lack of food at certain periods. However, the cop never questioned why there was scars on his biceps. The cop left and the two were left in silence until Sarah speaks up. "Kyle, why didn't you tell anyone sooner?" She asked.

"If I did, they would have killed me and fled town. Plus, I didn't want to put you guys in harm's way." He answered.

Her expression saddened. "What about the scars on your arms? I know those couldn't have been from them." She said.

"Your right." Kyle said with a sigh. "I had to do this to try to find a way to get my mind off the physical and emotional pain I was under. I hated it, but they never bought me medicine, so this was the only way."

They sit in silence for a moment until Sarah speaks up. "Kyle, why don't you live with us now? Your other foster parents will be in prison rotting away, so you have nothing to be afraid of."

Kyle looks at her and smiles. "I would like that. But..." He looks away for a moment before looking back at her. "Can I have my named changed?"

She looks confused. "What would you want that?"

"Because my name will fill me with nothing but bad memories of everything that has happened to me." He answered.

"Okay. What would you like your new name to be?" She asked.

Kyle smiles. "Emery. Emery Johnson." He said. Soon Kyle's dream faded to black until he was awaken by a pair of worried green eyes.

* * *

"Oh hey Monika. Why do you look so worried?" Kyle asked.

"You were talking in your sleep. It sounded like you were having a nightmare or something." She said.

Kyle got up and stretched before speaking. "That happens usually. How bad was it?" Kyle asked.

"Not that bad at all. You were just mumbling about failure, but I couldn't make it out clearly." She replied.

"Ha, that's the best news I heard in a while. Usually I'm screaming my head off." He said before walking to his closet to grab a spare change of clothes. "Hey Monika, I called Sayori and she's coming here to get you some clothes."

Before Monika can say anything else, Kyle raised his hand. "I told her that things aren't going well with your family, so you don't have to worry about her finding out about you permanently living here." He said.

Monika looked shocked. "Permanently? Like a couple?" She asked. Kyle stopped as he realized what he just said. His face started to heat up.

_Fuck I didn't mean it like that. Or did I? I'm so fucking confused with my emotions right now. I'll just have to figure this out later._

Before he can give a response, she smiled sadly. "I'm just kidding around. I'm sure you don't want me to be at your house." She said. Kyle didn't want to see her like that.

"You don't know that. What if I want you to stay here with me? Would that be a bad thing for you?" Kyle asked. She didn't get anytime to respond as they heard a knock on the door. Kyle sighed.

"Guess that's her. I'll be back later. We can talk about this when I get back." She said before going downstairs. Kyle soon heard the door close, which he sighed and sat down.

_Jesus Christ this is difficult. I forgot what it is like to be a teenager, but this goes beyond that in many ways. I can't help it that she has a desire to be with me, but why am I afraid of showing her that as well. Does she even have a desire to be with me?_

_...No I can't let her be with me of all people. I can't let her be here either. Otherwise, she will know about my worst secret. Fuck it, it's not even a secret, it's a horrible memory! She will view me differently for sure._

Kyle sighs. "I'm just going to work on the way to get us all out."


End file.
